- ↑ Wooz: "{100}{}{You see a tall ghoul with long hair.}"
"{101}{}{You see Wooz.}"
"{102}{}{You see an extremely tall and lanky ghoul with long hair.}"
(Wooz's dialogue)
- ↑ The Chosen One: "{115}{}{Tell me about this place.}"
Wooz: "{160}{}{Not much to tell, really. Just a bunch of ghouls clinging tenaciously to the ass-end of life.}"
The Chosen One: "{161}{}{No, I meant tell me about this bar.}"
Wooz: "{440}{}{Well, the Harp’s named after a favorite hangout that I used to have before the war. I guess it’s just a reminder of times past. Sort of a joke on the only way we’re going to get a better deal, too.}"
The Chosen One: "{441}{}{Before the war? But that was a long time ago.}"
Wooz: "{460}{}{It sure was a long time ago. How do you think ghouls are made? You think some of us just got up one fine day and said to ourselves: 'Gee, I wonder what it’d be like to have my flesh rotting off my fucking body?'}"
The Chosen One: "{461}{}{Well, no, I didn’t. Say, how do you make a ghoul?}"
Wooz: "490}{}{With silver-bells and cockleshells and… Boy, you are dumb, aren’t you? Severe radiation. That’s how. How do you think? You know, many bombs go boom, flash of light and heat, flesh burns off, but you don’t-quite-die-type severe radiation?}"
The Chosen One: "{491}{}{Uh well, I mean…}"
Wooz: "{500}{}{Well, I didn’t think so. Fuck you very much for bringing back all those intensely painful memories. Asshole. We’re a town of fucking leftovers -— slightly overcooked leftovers.}"
The Chosen One: "{501}{}{I prefer medium-rare myself. Hey, let me ask you something else.}"
(Wooz's dialogue)
- ↑ The Chosen One: "{114}{}{What do you do here?}"
Wooz: "{140}{}{I run this place. Are you dumb? I sell drinks, trade for things, tell stories, and play Tragic.}"
The Chosen One: "{144}{}{Tell stories?}"
Wooz: "{200}{}{I’ve got this great story. It’s really funny. You see there’s this head, right?}"
The Chosen One: "{201}{}{A head?}"
Wooz: "{530}{}{Yeah, it’s a head. But it’s not attached to a body. You see, it’s been severed.}"
The Chosen One: "{531}{}{A severed head. I see. And this becomes entertaining when?}"
Wooz: "{540}{}{Just hold on a minute. This severed head, you see, it’s in Hell. (hah, hah) And it flies around there, you know, in Hell. And it runs into all kinds of famous people there… (ho, ho, ho)}"
The Chosen One: "{541}{}{Wait, a severed head is in Hell, and it flies around…doing what?}"
Wooz: "{550}{}{Well, it’s doing stuff. (hee, hee) You know. It’s got, things that it wants to do, or maybe things it's forced to do. The point is, it’s doing stuff, you know, there in Hell. Oh God, (hah, hah, hah) I just can’t stand it!}"
The Chosen One: "{551}{}{You kind of obsess about this, don’t you? Hmm. Were you and your mother close? Did you ever have problems with bed-wetting?}"
Wooz: "{560}{}{No, you just don’t understand. It’s all about a severed head. Get it? Heh, heh, heh, It’s funny! How can you think about a severed head, in Hell of all places, and not laugh?}"
The Chosen One: "{561}{}{Wooz, I don’t know you very well, and I’m pretty sure I don’t want to. However, I think I can say, without fear of exaggeration, that you need help. Immediate, competent help. }"
Wooz: "{570}{}{Fuck you! You’re just like all the rest of them. I tell, you it’s hilariously funny. It’s not my fault that you don’t have a sense of humor.}"
The Chosen One: "{571}{}{You’re right, Wooz. I guess I’m just not as clever as you are. You’re truly a pearl amongst swine. Now tell me something else.}"
(Wooz's dialogue)
- ↑ The Chosen One: "{145}{}{Play Tragic?}"
Wooz: "{210}{}{Are you dumb? Tragic the Garnering is the most addictive thing since Jet.}"
The Chosen One: "{213}{}{What’s Jet?}"
Wooz: "{350}{}{Jet’s a drug that comes from New Reno. Were you born yesterday, or are you just dumb?}"
The Chosen One: "{351}{}{Oh, that Jet. Well, sure I knew about that. Tell me more about this Tragic the Garnering.}"
Wooz: "{211}{}{It’s like I was saying. Tragic the Garnering is the game to play.}"
The Chosen One: "{212}{}{Tell me more about this Tragic the Garnering.}"
Wooz: "{340}{}{Well, Tragic the Garnering isn’t just a game -- it’s an obsession. Not a cologne, either. Some think that the way it changes a person’s life is tragic, but they just don’t understand.}"
The Chosen One: "{341}{}{Uh huh.}"
Wooz: "{360}{}{No, really. It’s wonderful. You should play. Just once. The first box of cards is free. A little something from me to you.}"
The Chosen One: "{361}{}{Thanks. Hey, these look great. (you tear the wrapping off) Mmm, I just love that smell.}"
The Chosen One: "{381}{}{Sure, but you’re going to have to show me how.}"
Wooz: "{390}{}{Well, it’s simple, really. Even someone dumb can understand it. First, you build a play deck out of the cards that you have, and then you…}"
The Chosen One: "{391}{}{Uh, huh. You say you deal to the third player unless it’s Thursday? OK, I think I’ve got it now. Let’s play.}"
Wooz: "{400}{}{You won? Fuck you! I need a ruling on that. You just got lucky, this time. This deck of mine just didn’t work. I’ve got to build a better one.}"
The Chosen One: "{401}{}{Thanks for the cards, Wooz. And I thought you knew how to play this game? I guess you’re dumb.}"
(Wooz's dialogue)
- ↑ The Chosen One: "{116}{}{Have you ever heard of something called a Garden of Eden Creation Kit?}"
Wooz: "{130}{}{A Garden of Eden Creation Kit? You mean the device included with every vault that is supposed to be used when the people leave the vault in order to reestablish civilization?}"
The Chosen One: "{131}{}{Yes! That’s it! Where can I find one?}"
Wooz: "{120}{}{I just told you that every Vault has one. Does this look like a Vault to you? Are you dumb? Why are you looking for a GECK here? Try a Vault. }"
The Chosen One: "{121}{}{Where is the nearest Vault?}"
Wooz: "{270}{}{Nearest Vault? Gee, I don’t know. Maybe you could ask the people in Vault City where a Vault might be. Vault City’s just south of here. You are dumb, aren’t you?}"
The Chosen One: "{271}{}{I knew that. I was just testing you. Gee, Wooz, you’re so smart. Tell me something else.}"
(Wooz's dialogue)
- ↑ The Chosen One: "{113}{}{Booze, Wooz.}"
Wooz: "{170}{}{You want a drink, huh? Well, we’ve got our very own Gamma Gulp Beer at $5/bottle and, for special occasions, our Roentgen Rum at $12/bottle.}"
The Chosen One: "{175}{}{I want to buy a round of your fabulous Gamma Gulp Beer for everyone here.}"
Wooz: "{190}{}{You want to buy a round of drinks for everyone here? You must really be hard up for friends. That’ll cost you $35.}"
The Chosen One: "{191}{}{Cost is no object, my good man. I’d like a round of drinks for everyone here, Wooz.}"
(Wooz's dialogue)
- ↑ Wooz: "{714}{}{Ever seen a grown man NAKED?!}"
(Wooz's dialogue)
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