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FoS vault dwellers
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This is a transcript for dialogue with Vault dwellers in Fallout Shelter.

Conversations

General

Statement
Just another great day in the Vault. Glad I'm in here and not out there...
Things are looking good. Maybe the Overseer will send me out exploring soon...
I think we should throw a party. Everybody loves parties! Did China build Vaults? Huh
I'd whistle a tune right now... if I knew how. I wonder what day it is. Not that it matters.
I've got one goal in life - to make this Vault perfect! Could things get any better? Probably not.
Thinking of starting a Vault baseball team... Anybody want to do a puzzle later?
How's everybody doing? Everybody doing okay?
Hey gang! How does that joke go again? A man and a rabbit walk into a bar...
I've got this song stuck in my head. La la, di di do do... Oooh. I think I feel a bathroom break coming on.
I feel like I've been on my feet forever... Wonder if there's enough room to play football in the Vault...
Maybe I'll read a good book later. One of the classics. Hmm... Maybe we should all paint the Vault a different color.
Huh. Thought I heard a humming in the ventilation system. Was that... skittering? Darned Radroaches could be right under us.
Nothing like feeling safe and secure. If we keep expanding, we may reach China!
I'm tired of Cram. We really need a taco night I could really go with a nice, relaxing bath.
Brrr... There's a draft coming from somewhere. I wonder what the future will bring...
Why blue? I mean, would a yellow jumpsuit really be THAT bad? What's that smell? Is... EW. Plumbing must be backed up again.
I bet the Overseer is like Santa Claus. Fat, magical, and always watching. I'm just full of vim and vigor!
Our Vault feels just like a robot's womb! If robots... had mothers... Someday, maybe my grandkids will live here!
Can you milk a Brahmin? ‘Cause that would mean... ICE CREAM! Ahhh, my aching back. We really need a Vault masseuse.
Everybody doing okay? Of course we are! We working hard, or hardly working? He he he he.
The lack of sun is getting to me. Time to up my vitamin D dosage. I don't care if the oceans are irradiated. I'd kill for some fish and chips.
Hey hey hey, what do you say? Time for a coffee break yet?
Nuka-Cola this, Nuka-Cola that. I want some root beer. I need to look into Vault-Tec's retirement plan...
If more bombs fell, would we even know it? Probably not. Come on, everyone! The Overseer's counting on us!
I'm so happy today! I love the Vault! And my anti-depressants! I admit, I've never seen another Vault, but ours MUST be the best.
I heard there are Vaults all over the country. But that's crazy talk. Is it true there are Vaults all across the world? Naaahhh.
I wonder how high the Vault numbers go... I'm special, gosh darn it. And someday, the Overseer WILL notice me.
Anybody need help with anything? I wonder how a Vault Suit would look with cowboy boots.
One thing they never tell you – are you supposed to wear underwear under the jumpsuit or not? I don't care what everyone says. Getting my pilot's license is NOT a crazy pipe dream.
Wait, is this my free time or my work time? I can't keep track anymore. I wonder if anyone wants to go to the Living Quarters with me and... dance.

Vault conversations

Statement Possible replies
Knock knock. No, NO. Please, no more "knock knock" jokes...
Aggh! Somebody's knocking on the Vault door! It's a Raider! He'll kill us all!
Nobody's home. See what I did there?
Come on in
Oh my God! Raiders at the Vault Door! Raiders at the Vault Door!
Who's there? Wait. You know what? Never mind. I don't care.
If you could leave the Vault and go claim any type of building for your home, what would it be? Another Vault, all to myself, where nobody can ask me stupid questions.
Um... a house?
A castle. With a moat, and battlements, and a drawbridge. Oh, and dragons. Got to have dragons.
Want to play a game later? Checkers or something? Checkers? What are we, ten years old?? We will play Chess.
Oh, maybe. I'll check my duty schedule and get back to you.
Sure! That sounds like fun!
Is it drafty in here, or is it just me? You know, I think it is. Someone needs to check the seals on the Vault door.
It's just you.
The environmental controls may be on the fritz again. Can't say I'm surprised.
Who do you think would win in a fight, a lumberjack with tentacle arms or a shark riding a unicycle?[note 1] Depends. What color is the unicycle?
And why do they have to fight? Why they can't be friends and go grab coffee?
Hmmm. I mean, it's hard to beat a shark. But lumberjacks are really tough. I just can't decide.
Hey, I just wanted to say... I really appreciate everything you do for the vault. Oh my goodness! Thank you so much. I appreciate everything you do, too.
Oh. Well. Umm... Isn't that... sweet?
Finally, someone recognizes how invaluable I am!
If it were safe to leave the Vault, and live on the outside, would you ever want to? Well, maybe. But it depends on what they have out there. Carnivals? Street car races? cotton candy? I mean, it would have to be worth it.
Nope. Never. I love living in the Vault. This is my home... and always will be.
Ha! Like it will ever be safe out there...
We're safe here in the Vault... Right? Of course! The Overseer would never let anything happen to us!
Compared to what exactly?
Safer than we'd be outside, that's for sure!
I've been thinking of making a cake for everyone. What flavor would be best? Chocolate. Definitely chocolate.
Raisinberry! Wait... Is that even a real fruit?
Triple-layer vanilla walnut. With a coconut fondant.
Up for a game of cards later? Sure, Poker, we'll play for caps.
No thanks. I'm going to play solitaire instead.
Hmm. Maybe. But only if I can deal.
What do you think would make the scariest mutated animal? Hmmm... Maybe a monkey. Those things are creepy.
A hippo. Definitely a hippo.
Probably a shark. With legs.
If you could have any type of person come in our Vault, who would it be? A great comedian! I mean, no offense, but your jokes kind of stink.
Probably a renowned Swiss chocolatier. What? I like chocolate.
An author. They could write my biography: "Dweller. A profile in Awesomeness".
I want to draw you a picture later. Any requests? No thanks. I've seen your drawings...
A drawing of the Overseer. Now THAT would be something...
Aw, that's so sweet of you. How about a lighthouse?
Hey, did you hear what they were talking about last night? I know! I can't believe she did that! The nerve of some people.
I didn't, no. But that's okay. Unlike some people, I don't like to spread gossip...
Oh, you mean that, er... situation? With the thing? Oh, I heard, all right.
If I started a Vault baseball team, would you join? Nah. I'm more of a croquet person, myself.
Baseball? In the Vault? Good luck with that.
Sure. But only if I get to play first base. That's where all the action is.
Can you help with my crossword? Six-letter word. "Lives in the Wasteland." Hmmm... "Raider"?
Try "Nitwit".
Oh, I know! "Corpse"!
Is it true what they're saying? About... you know who? Sure is. And he seemed like such a nice guy.
What? No! Of course it isn't true! Really, you can't believe everything you hear...
I really hope not. I hate the idea of living in the same Vault with a person like that.
Stay sharp! The Overseer's watching us! I know. It's a little creepy, isn't it?
You're imagining things.
What? You mean now? RIGHT NOW?
I was wondering - what's your favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.
Why the classic, of course - pepperoni.
I prefer a Hawaiian Mongolian Neapolitan blend. But no anchovies.
Want to play catch later? Sure. Football or baseball?
Not really. But you want to kick the soccer ball around instead?
I never learned how to catch. But you should see me throw!
I'm writing a new song, praising the Overseer. I need a word that rhymes with "Great". How about "perambulate"?
Oh, I know - “super amazingly great”!
"Vertebrate"? "Stablemate"? "Encapsulate"? Or maybe just "ate."
I've been reading about the creatures of the Wasteland. They sound frightening! I know! Flies the size of dogs! Scorpions the size of cows! Glad I'm not out there.
I've heard there are lots of animals with two heads. Apparently it's a theme.
I don't know. Some of them sound kind of cute. Like "Yao Guai" - how bad could that be?
I wish I had a pet. What about you? I wish I had a chameleon. But I bet the radiation would make it all... weird.
You know, I always wanted a dog.
Nah. But a robot servant would be pretty great.
I think for dinner I'll have a big steak. What about you? Probably just something quick. Maybe a bowl of Sugar Bombs.
Oh, I could eat Fancy Lads Snack Cakes for any meal. In fact, I usually do.
Same thing I have for dinner every night - a can of Pork 'n Beans and an ice cold Nuka-Cola.
Wow. Heck of a day, huh? You can say that again.
Tell me about it. Life in the Vault, huh?
Right? But I wouldn't trade it for anything.
How many other Vaults do you think are out there? Other Vaults? There are other Vaults?
I bet... two others. Maybe three. Or five hundred.
You know, I've never thought about it. Our Vault is so amazing, why would I?
I'm reading this great book. It's about a schoolteacher who falls in love with a mechanic. "Rulers and Wrenches"? Yeah, that's a good one.
Oh! I read that one! She dies at the end. It's so sad.
I read that, too. Seven times. We really need more books...
Want to listen to the radio later? Maybe. So long as you don't start dancing. It's kind of embarrassing.
Okay, but no sad songs! I need to stay positive.
Sure! Maybe we can pick up a frequency from someone on the outside...
Ugh. I have this itch. I don't suppose you could... you know. Yeeeeaaah. Not gonna happen.
Touch you? I... I mean... scratch your... body?
Of course! Always happy to help a friend in need.
I hear you've been doing great work lately. Really? That's so great to hear. Thank you!
From who? The Overseer? Has the Overseer been talking about me?
Oh, you know, I just do the best I can. If it helps the Vault, it helps us all.
Don't get too close. I think I'm coming down with something. Don't worry. That was never on my agenda.
Oooh, what is it? Black Death? Typhus? Super Ebola? The Blue Flu?
Yeah, looks like you're coming down with an acute case of hypochondria.
Hello! Hmph.
Well hey there!
Always great to see you. Really.
What's shakin, bacon? What are you, 12?
Hmmm...Bacon.
Just dwellin' like a felon.
If you could visit one famous landmark in the outside world, what would it be? Oh, the Eiffel Tower. Definitely. So romantic. Assuming, you know... it's still there.
Hmm... Probably that giant ball of yarn. Always did want to see that.
The Great Wall of China. I bet it's still standing.
My birthday's coming up. What are you going to get me? A dictionary, so you can look up the definition of "selfish."
Hand-knitted socks, of course. They're my specialty.
A one-way ticket to the Wasteland.
I need a screwdriver for my project. Do you have one? I have a hammer. Same thing.
Phillips, flat, square, Frearson, Pozidriv or JIS?
Sure do. You can borrow it for 200 caps.
What would win in a fight? A Radscorpion or a Yao Guai? You're kidding, right? Radscorpion. All the way.
Hmmm... Scorpion against bear... Gotta go bear.
Who cares? Super Mutant Behemoth vs. Deathclaw. Now that's a REAL fight.
Is it night or day? I've lost track. Night. I think.
Day. Definitely day.
I lost track. Does it really matter?
Somebody stole my sweetroll?[note 2] My goodness! Who could have done such a thing! *burp*
That is... quite a predicament. I'm sure the Overseer will see to this personally. Really.
That's terrible! You just don't mess with a person's sweetroll...
Need help with this crossword. Nine letters. Starts with "c" and ends with "d." Means, "A horror you can never escape." Crossword.
Duuuuh...Cat?
Cornfield?
Have you read the book yet? For book club? Yep, sure have. I can't believe she died at the end. From chicken pox. So sad.
Oh, darn. Was that this week? I totally forgot.
No. I keep telling you I only read Grognak.
Okay, I don't like to spread rumors. But have you heard about... the thing? Well, I have, but I don't believe it.
Yes! The others told me! It sounds so... dangerous!
No, I haven't. Is it anything like... the whatchamacallit?
How's it going? How's it going, you ask? Why it's going fantastic? *Play along – the Overseer might be listening.*
Oh, it's... fine. Not good. Not bad. You know. Just sort of... meh.
Wait... do you really want to know? Or is that just your way of saving "Hi"?
If we kept expanding down and struck lava, what would you do? Hmmm? Probably weaponize it. To fight the Mole Men.
Oh, that's easy. I'd be a new thermogenerator. Because... POWER!
Well, I'd burn to death, I'm guessing.
Do you smell something funny? Just the usual. Sweat, oil, steel, moldy bread and loneliness.
Yes, actually. I noticed it just as you walked up...
Nope. Nothing. But you may have a sinus infection.
You heard the one about the football coach and the waitress? I have! And the waitress says, "Keep the change? But I'm wearing a denim!" Ha ha ha ha! Love that one...
Sorry, no time for jokes.
Yes. From you. Several times.
Have you seen my best friend? Yeah, she went that way.
But... But... I thought I was your best friend...
Hmm? Oh, yeah, I think he's down there.
Can you help with my crossword? Five-letter word, ends with "t." - "Often terrible, always uncomfortable." Sorry, I'm more of a math person.
That's easy. Bigot. No, wait – Theft! Yeast?
Vault.
Busy? Nah, not really.
Busy as a bee tucked away in a subterranean steel honeycomb!
Do I LOOK busy?
Wow, I have the jitters! Too much caffeine! That's the spirit! Decaf is for the weak!
Ssshh. Don't let the Overseer hear. You'll get assigned a double shift.
Me too! I should probably stop spiking my Nuka-Cola with espresso...
I don't want to toot my own horn, but rumor has it I'll be the next Overseer. Really? I think you'd make a great Overseer!
The day that happens is the day I wander into the Wasteland.
Fine by me. I'll blindly follow anyone with a title and authority.
If Raiders attack, can we count on you in a fight? You know it! I'll gladly lay down my life for this Vault.
Yeeeeaahhh... See, I'm more of a "lover not a fighter" type.
Absolutely. I'll be there right next to you. Well, maybe behind you...
I've been working out. Building up my bis, tris, quads, pecs. Wow, yeah! I can totally tell! Lookin' good!
Really? I never would have known.
Might want to tighten up those glutes.
I found a Vault Suit on the floor. What do you think it means? That you live with a bunch of slobs?
Isn't it obvious? Someone's been disintegrated.
It can only mean one thing – nudie party!
I wish I could learn another language. What about you? Ah, but I am already fluent in the language... of love.[note 3]
I'd love to learn binary code, so I can bargain for my life when the robots enslave us all.
Nah, I can barely speak this one.
So, I've decided to write the great American novel. It's about all of us! Just change my name, okay? I value what little privacy I have down here.
Oooh! Am I one of the main characters? I bet I am. I mean, how could I not be?
You? Write a novel? Have you maybe considered... a coloring book instead?
Got this song stuck in my head. "Baby, yeah, babbbyyyy! You can light my..." Soul afffllaaame!
Cigarette! Whoo!
House on fire?
What's up? Oh, you know. A ceiling made of steel. With a copious amount of asbestos, by the looks of it.
Not much! Just happy that I'm here in the Vault, and not out in the Wasteland! You know... dying.
Well, I'm busy. What about you? Don't YOU have somewhere else to be? Hint hint.

Living quarters conversations

Statement Reply
I think that steam is making me lightheaded. You're imagining things. Then again, maybe that's because of the steam.
If I started a Knitting League, think anyone would sign up? They'd be crazy not to!
Think we'll ever get to live outside the Vault? Maybe. But why would you want to?
I wish we had some plants in here. Maybe hydroponics can grow some gardenias.
Sometimes, I imagine this room is actually a giant mansion, on 50 acres. Sometimes I imagine I'm not living with a crazy person.
I really wish we had a Mr. Handy Yeah, but a Mr. Gutsy would be way more fun.
I need to remember to stock the fridge with Nuka-Cola. And beer. Don't forget beer.
I was thinking of hanging up some paintings. Oh, good idea. Maybe cats. Or ships. Or cats on ships.
I'm too lazy to go to the Cardio Room. I wish we had a treadmill in here. You... do see the irony in that statement. Don't you?
The sofa needs repairs. I keep sinking into the cushions. Maybe there's a new one in the Wasteland. Well, not a new one...
Think I should paint the room? Maybe. But no yellow. I hate yellow.
You think that camera sees... everything? I sure hope not!
It's so good to have some free time to talk. Actually, I just want to relax, so... Ssssshhhh.
If we lived outside, I'd have servants. If you lived outside, you'd be dead.
Want to play some cards? Maybe later.
My feet are killing me. I should probably sit down. Just please don't take off your shoes.
I wish I had a yoga mat in here. A what now?
I think the room needs a rug. Maybe there's one in storage. Good idea. My feet get so cold in the morning.
Home sweet home. If you say so.
Have you ever actually seen the Overseer? No, but I do always get the sense that someone's watching me...

Vault monologues

Condition Possible replies
Happy I love my life!
Looks like I turned my frown upside down permanently!
Life is great!
Everything is just... perfect.
Not a care in the world!
I feel a sense of... bliss.
I'm so happy I could pinch myself.
Life just couldn't get any better.
My life is so awesome.
I really hope everyone else is as happy as I am.
Could I get any happier? Nope.
Another wonderful day in the Vault.
What a great day!
If joy is a state of mind, then my state of mind is great!
I'm just so happy I could burst! But don't worry... I won't.
Love job (General) Best. Job. EVER.
To think, I've finally found my dream job.
The G.O.A.T. was right! This is the perfect job for me!
Hard work is happy work!
Hope there's a chance for overtime!
This place would fall apart without me.
What can I say? I'm great at my job.
I can't imagine doing anything else in the Vault.
The Overseer really made a smart move assigning me here.
So glad I got assigned here!
This really is the perfect work assignment for me.
I have the perfect work assignment. Thanks, Overseer!
This room is running at peak efficiency... thanks to me!
If I weren't working here, production wouldn't be nearly so good.
Every day's a good day when I'm on the job.
With me working here, maximum efficiency is guaranteed!
Don't worry you've got ME on the job.
What a perfect work assignment for me...
Have I mentioned recently how much I love my job?
Love job (Athletics room) Nobody trains harder than I do. Nobody.
Love job (Armory) I knew being a total gun nut would come in handy some day!
Love job (Lounge) I could sling drinks all day!
Love job (Diner) Preparing food is my lifelong dream!
Love job (Game room) Poker or blackjack - I'm the best dealer there is!
Love job (Classroom) That teacher of the year award is so close, I can feel it!
Love job (Fitness room) I'm the fittest person in this Vault. And always will be.
Love job (Nuclear reactor) With me on the job, this Vault will never go dark!
Love job (Power generator) My technical expertise keeps this place running.
Love job (Weight room) Could I get any stronger? Probably not!
Love job (Garden) So great to be putting my green thumb to use!
Love job (Living quarters) If relaxing were a job, I'd be Employee of the Month!
Love job (Medbay) If I can't heal you, nobody can!
Love job (Nuka-Cola bottler) I have achieved the perfect mixture! I'd a soda genius!
Love job (Radio studio) I'm so good, I could contact China. If it's, you know...
Love job (Science lab) My experiments could change all our lives for the better!
Love job (Storage room) Nobody stores junk like me!
Love job (Water treatment) I can turn anything into drinkable water! Anything...
Love job (Water purification) Tastes like spring water, thanks to me!
Dislike someone in a room (General) Oh great. It's... you.
Seriously? We have to work together?
The incompetence of some people...
Ugh.
Dislike someone in a room (Athletics room) Look who's here to show off. Again.
Dislike someone in a room (Armory) The temptation to grab a weapon and shoot you is overwhelming.
Dislike someone in a room (Lounge) No amount of alcohol can make me like you.
Dislike someone in a room (Diner) Ugh. Just go away. I'm losing my appetite.
Dislike someone in a room (Game room) Take a hike. You're ruining my luck.
Dislike someone in a room (Classroom) I'm just here to learn. Not put up with this know-it-all.
Dislike someone in a room (Fitness room) If only I had the endurance to deal with idiots like you.
Dislike someone in a room (Nuclear reactor) This is serious work we're doing in here. So why are you here?
Dislike someone in a room (Power generator) Someone get this incompetent imbecile out of here.
Dislike someone in a room (Weight room) Yes, yes. You're super strong and awesome. We get it.
Dislike someone in a room (Garden) If I could, I'd grow a Venus flytrap to eat you alive.
Dislike someone in a room (Living quarters) Don't you have someplace else to be? Like out in the Wasteland?
Dislike someone in a room (Medbay) I'm tempted to kill you, but they'd probably save your life.
Dislike someone in a room (Nuka-Cola bottler) No amount of sugar can sweeten our relationship. I despise you.
Dislike someone in a room (Radio studio) Maybe I can send out an S.O.S. and get saved from your stupidity.
Dislike someone in a room (Science lab) Anyone ever tell you you're like an experiment gone?
Dislike someone in a room (Storage room) I'd lock you in storage if I could. Forever.
Dislike someone in a room (Water treatment) I'd drown them in a water tank if I could get away with it...
Dislike someone in a room (Water purification) If only we had the technology to remove the impurities from... you.
Success rush We maximized production! Great work!
Fail rush Oh no! Critical production failure!
Speech Radio (high charisma) If there is someone out there, they'll sure be listening to me!
To all people out in the Wasteland: We are waiting for you!
Speech Radio (low charisma) I don't think anyone is listening.
Hello? Is anyone out there?
Some radiation. Is my... nose bleeding?
So... weak...
Feeling kind of dizzy...
I feel nauseous.
I think I'm going to throw up...
Lots of radiation. My skin's starting to glow!
Aggh! My fingernails are falling off!
I could really use a RadAway!
Is that a hand... growing out of my stomach?
Someone help! I don't want to become a Ghoul!
After healing from radiation Phew! I really needed that!
After being healed I feel so much better!
When injured (high health) Ugh. Not feeling that well...
I really need a breath of fresh air. Oh wait.
I could really use some rest.
Hmm. Not feeling too great...
I think I'm coming down with something.
I need to take better care of myself
When injured (medium health) I need a sick day.
I feel terrible.
Anybody got a Stimpak?
I think I need to lie down... for an hour or three...
I feel awful.
When injured (low health) I'm dying! Somebody help me!
I need a Stimpak!
I need a doctor! This is an emergency!
Life... flashing before my eyes...
I'm headed towards the light...
Goodbye, cruel world!
Near a corpse (General) Oh, a corpse! Isn't that pleasant!
Smells like something died in here... Oh.
Can somebody please get this corpse out of here!
Working next to a dead body. Not great for my productivity...
Near a corpse (Athletics room) So it is possible to exercise too much...
Near a corpse (Armory) They're dead! Was it a weapons malfunction?
Near a corpse (Lounge) What were they drinking? I'll have a double.
Near a corpse (Diner) That has GOT to be a health violation.
Near a corpse (Game room) Well, you know what they say. You can't take it with you.
Near a corpse (Classroom) That's one way to gain all the knowledge in the universe.
Near a corpse (Fitness room) Someone lacked endurance, am I right?
Near a corpse (Nuclear reactor) Great, now we're short staffed.
Near a corpse (Power generator) Worked till they dropped. Such dedication!
Near a corpse (Weight room) Must have been a heck of a workout.
Near a corpse (Garden) Hey, more fertilizer! Too soon?
Near a corpse (Living quarters) At least they passed away peacefully, at home.
Near a corpse (Medbay) So much for the finest medical care Vault-Tec could provide.
Near a corpse (Nuka-Cola bottler) Hey you! No slacking on the production line!
Near a corpse (Radio studio) Looks like I've got a eulogy to broadcast.
Near a corpse (Science lab) I hope they at least donated their body to science.
Near a corpse (Storage room) I'd take care of the body myself, but the smell might be a bit much.
Near a corpse (Water treatment) We've got a serious sanitation problem in here!
Near a corpse (Water purification) Get that corpse out of here! It'll contaminate everything!
No power. This room's useless unless we generate more power!
We've gone dark! We need more power!
There isn't enough power! We need more!
We can't use the room! There's not enough power!
Oh no! Blackout! The room's offline until we get more power!
In living quarters there are no more places. We can't start a family. There's no more room in the Vault.
The Vault is too crowded to have any more babies.
In living quarters same sex But this is biologically impossible!
In living quarters with family Nothing like hanging out at home with my family.
In living quarters with non-related opposite-sex dweller You think maybe... I could call you baby?
I find myself completely drawn to you.
I don't know how I'd get by without you.
I think about you all the time!
Is there a thief in the Vault? 'Cause you stole my heart.
So what are you up to for the rest of your life?
Are you a book in the Vault library? 'Cause I am checking you out.
If I could sing, I'd totally write a song about you.
We make such a cute couple.
If I were a cat, I'd want to spend all 9 lives with you.
Do you have a map? I'm getting lost in your eyes.
I really think we could have a future together.
I'm not a photographer, but I can picture you and me together.
Can you get that for me? I dropped my jaw.
I could use a good kiss.
I've been thinking of you all day.
Like an irradiated post-apocalyptic parasitic organism, you are under my skin.
Sorry, I'm all out of raisings. But you can have a date.
You're like a cute, chubby polar bear – always trying to break the ice.
What would I do without you?
I think... I think I'm in like In-game spelling, punctuation and/or grammar with you.
You always make me smile.
You make me feel like dancing.
Your lips. They're just so... smoochable.
Are you swooning, or is that the radiation poisoning?
Are you this nice to all the Dwellers?
Baby, who cares about the sun? I'm the only light you need.
Sound the alarm! We've got a thief in the Vault! They stole my heart! Heh.
You're the loveliest person I know.
You're like cholesterol, always messin' with my heart.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.
Did you father sell diamonds? 'Cause you are flawless.
It's so great to see you.
If roses still grew, I'd search the Wasteland to get you some.
Do you have a watch? I think it's snuggle time.
Seriously, could you get any cuter?
You have beautiful eyes.
I just love spending time with you.
I really want to kiss you right now.
Is that a Raider setting off explosives or is my heart pounding?
You're like food poisoning - tying my stomach in knots.
I get butterflies whenever we're together.
Is it getting warm in here, or is it just me?
If kisses were snowflakes, well... you'd better get some boots, that's all I'm saying.
I saw the doctor. He said my body's deficient... in vitamin U.
Sometimes, late at night, I smell the sweat and steel... and I know that you smell it too.
I think Cupid just emptied his quiver...
You must be a genie, because you're making my dreams come true.
You have beautiful thighs. Eyes! I meant eyes! But your thighs are beautiful too.
Is there a Yao Guai in the Vault? He must be looking for you, honey.
I think we're having an earthquake, 'cause I'm falling for you.
I'm a licensed Vault Suit inspector. I'm going to need to hug you VERY closely.
Is that love in the air, or is the oxygen circulator on the fritz again?
Finally some alone time.
Do you really like me?
I must have died in that last Radroach attack, 'cause baby? I'm in heaven.
I've been thinking of you all day.
Nuka-Cola's got nothin' on you, sugar.
If I seem drunk, it's only because you're so intoxicating.
Your teeth are so shiny and beautiful. Like a skeleton that's been picked clean.
I hope another bomb goes off. I'd duck and cover with you anytime.
I want to love you like this is my last day on Earth. Because it probably is.
I'd be so lonely here without you.
You're the apple of my eye.
Are we in a vertibird? 'Cause my heart's taking off?
If love was radiation, I'd need a box of RadAways.
You're so sweet, I'm getting a toothache.
Call for you. It's Heaven, wondering if you're coming home.
Is that jumpsuit felt? Would you like it to be?
I'm glad we got some time together.
You're so attractive.
I love talking to you.
You're so sweet.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put B and O together. No! Wait! That's not right...
Come here often? I mean, we're all trapped down here, so I assume yes, but still...
You're like a broken thermostat. I just can't turn you down.
Impressed? You will be.
Call the doctor! I'm having a heart infarction! That's a heart attack. Because you're so... Oh, never mind.
You look really nice.
Happiness parent Children are the future of this Vault.
My kid's a little angel.
I'm not saying I have the best kid in the Vault, but... I totally do.
Reproducing isn't just fun. It's our responsibility.
Being a parent is such a big responsibility. Good thing I'm great at it!
It's so comforting to know my child will grow up here in the Vault.
My child is so perfect, I feel sorry for every other parent in here.
Could my child BE more wonderful?
Where's that child of mine? Bringing joy to the whole Vault, I'm sure!
One day my perfect kid will grow into a perfect adult!
Someday, my awesome kid will be an awesome worker!
Children are like chocolates! You can never have too many!
Having kids means keeping our Vault going... forever!

Flavor text

Room Possible replies
Living quarters Think I'll just relax for a bit.
Time for a shift yet?
Good to have some time to myself.
If only I had the right kind of company...
It's not much... but it's home.
Production room Things are running smoothly.
All systems nominal.
No problems. Just the way I like it
We seem to be running at peak efficiency.
Production is maximized. Good.
Service room Wonder what's for dinner?
Yaaawwn
Maybe I should take a walk outside. What's the worst that could happen?
The Vault is kind of like a house, I guess. A big, metal, subterranean house.
I'm kind of bored. I guess I should be thankful.
Training room Nothing like working up a sweat!
Faster stronger better!
Time to get the blood pumping!
Feel like I could take on the Commies bared handed!
Cardio, weights, calisthenics I can do it all!
Great time for a workout!

Children

Statement
I wish more kids lived here. Anybody want to play checkers?
If I snuck outside, would anyone notice? I wonder what it's like out in the Wasteland.
Who wants to play hopscotch? I could drink Nuka-Cola all day long.
Maybe someone can find me some baseball cards. I wish we had TV in here.
Sure wish I had a BB gun... I wonder if anyone in the Wasteland still makes comics...
When I grow up, I'm going to explore the Wasteland! Someday I'll take the G.O.A.T. test and get to work!
Wish I was old enough to gamble in the casino. Who wants to play hide and seek?
Sometimes I feel the Overseer... watching me. Wonder if the cafeteria has any cookies.
The grown ups are always so busy! I wonder if I'll live in this Vault forever.
Can you have a snowball fight during nuclear winter? When do I get a Pip-Boy?
Wonder what the weather's like outside. The Overseer is my hero!
I've read Grognak #1 thirty seven times! I wonder how many other Vaults are out there.
Are there any kids out there in the Wasteland? My mom and dad are always so busy...
Snack time yet? Really wish I had a pet.
Maybe someone can build me a robot. I bet there are mutant hamsters out in the Wasteland.
My parents have the best jobs ever! I want to have a sleepover tonight!
The Vault is like a big, metal pillow fort! I bet I could make a sling shot. That would be so cool.
The Vault really needs some new toys. This is the best Vault ever!
Time for ice cream yet? My mom and dad really help keep this place running!
Hey everybody! How's it going? Anybody want to throw the ol' football around?
Do they play sports in the Wasteland? Rock, paper, scissors... shoot!
Help, there's a mutant in the Vault! Just kidding! No school, no babysitter - this is the life!
Hi everyone! I hope we have donuts for breakfast tomorrow.
I wish I had a chemistry set. -

Eviction

Statement
My death is on your conscience! After I conquer the Wasteland, I'm going to come back and conquer you!
It's been real, it's been nice, but it hasn't been real nice. So you're really doing it. Kicking me out. Not cool...
The Wasteland. Greeeeeaaaat. Whatever. I outgrew this Vault a long time ago anyway.
You're going to miss me more than I miss you! So long, suckers!
I was planning on leaving anyway. So there. You're going to regret this. You'll see.
Was it something I said? Wait. Wait wait wait. One sec, okay? There has to be a mistake!
Can't we talk about this? Banishment? Seriously?
You'll rue the day you banished me! Rue the day! But I can still come visit, right? Right?
This is ridiculous. Do you have any idea how important I am? Wait ‘till the Overseer hears about this. Heads are going to roll!
Worst. Day. EVER. Freedom! Sweet, terrible freedom!
Later, ‘taters. “A Better Future... Underground.” Yeah, right.
Well, it was nice while it lasted. At least now I'll be able to own my own home.
Overseer! Overseer, help! They're kicking me out! Pfffft. Whatever.
You guys are doing me a favor. I was getting too soft in the Vault. But I can still come back and visit. Right?
Let's get one thing straight - you're not evicting me! I'm leaving of my own free will! If there was a problem, you could have mentioned that BEFORE KICKING ME OUT!

Wasteland quotes

Starting entry

Statement
Here we go. Finally, some fresh air.
I won't stray too far. Just in case. This doesn't seem so bad.
Once more unto the breach![note 4] It's brighter than I expected.
Wow, is it always this hot out here? Away we go!
I wonder what's left? All right, Wasteland. Here I come!
Ah. So that's why they call it the Wasteland. Yep. Everything's destroyed.
Okay, this is kind of... depressing. I'll make the Vault proud. They'll see.
And I'm off! Thought I'd never get out of there.
This is so exciting! I'm ready for anything.
Come on Wasteland show me what you've got! Okay. I can do this.
I wonder how far I can get on foot? Super Mutants are just a myth... right?
This isn't so bad. Maybe we should all leave the Vault... Hope I can find my way back.
I'll grab just as much as I can carry, then head back. If I find just one box of Sugar Bombs, it'll be worth it.
I guess I'll head... that way. Maybe I should have dropped some bread crumbs.
This way looks promising. My feet hurt already.
Starting to regret coming out here. Maybe I'm not cut out for exploring after all.
I will not return a failure. I will not return a failure... The Vault's counting on me. I've got to push on.
That way looks promising. I'm bound to run into somebody sooner or later.
I really don't want to get eaten out here... If I die out here, they'll never know...
This way looks as good as any. There's got to be something out here.

Monologues

Statement
Guess I'll go this way. I really should be drawing a map.
Ow. Rock in my shoe. Legs are cramping. But I must go on.
Hmm. Something over there? Could be something over there.
This way looks as good as any other. Sure wish I had a traveling buddy.
Have I started talking to myself? I can't tell. I'm going to need such a bath when I get home.
Is someone following me? These tracks - human, or something else?
Hello? Anybody out here? What was that?
The Vault is counting on me. I won't let them down. Clouds on the horizon. Hope it doesn't rain.
I'll follow this road, see where it goes. A crossroads. Left or right? Let's try left.
A crossroads. Left or right? I guess I'll go right. It sure gets lonely out here.
Should I head back to the Vault? Maybe in a bit. It's quiet. Too quiet.
Wonder what's over there. I'll climb that ridge and get the lay of the land.
I sense danger everywhere... Just got to keep moving forward.
I'd be totally lost without my Pip-Boy. Broken branches. Something passed through here.
Nowhere to go but straight ahead. Fresh tracks. Can't tell what made them.
I bet this neighborhood was nice once. Hard to imagine people actually living out here.
The more supplies I bring back to the Vault, the better. I'm going to have such blisters tomorrow...
I'll head that way. Might be something interesting. Hmm? Something over there?
Fresh tracks. Animal, or... worse? Should I go that way? Hmmm. No, I'll go this way.
Wonder if someone will give me a massage when I get back. Ow, my aching feet...
If the others could only see how bad it is for themselves... Sky looks funny over there. Storm might be coming.
A fork in the road. Guess I'll go left. A fork in the road. Guess I'll go right.
Think I'll go down this path. This path looks good.
Hmm... Broken plants. Someone pass by here? Never knew I could sweat so much!
This sure is good exercise, if nothing else. Thought I saw something...
What was that sound? Traveling alone sure is, well... lonely.
Need to bring supplies back to the Vault. Focus on that... All this walking is murder on my feet.
Good thing I'm wearing sensible footwear! Calves, thighs, knees - they're all hurting.
Sweat in my eyes. Ouch. I'll head back to the Vault. But not yet. Not yet...
When I get back to the Vault, they'll hail me as a hero! Looks like a lake. Definitely don't want to go swimming in THAT.
On the ground. Is that dried... blood? Looks like a trail of paint. Oh, wait. Nope. That's blood.
I'm a bundle of nerves... Okay, I'll admit it. I'm terrified.
I won't give in to my fear. I won't give in to my fear. I'd whistle a tune, but my mouth is too dry.
If I get lost out here, I'm in serious trouble. People actually live out here? Ugh.
Oh, that's a nice little house. Or at least it was. Looks like an old store. Wonder what they sold?
Oh look, an old bus stop. Sure wish I could catch a ride. Am I talking to myself? I think I am. Uh oh.
An old elementary school. Wow, that's not depressing at all... I'll keep going this way.
Think I'll head that way for awhile. Time to turn back? Nah.
An old coffee shop. Sure could go for a cup of joe right about now. Is that...an old Nuka-Cola factory? Too bad it's destroyed.
I hear chanting. Probably some crazy cult. Better keep my distance. An old hospital. Looks like it's been picked clean.
Some old department store. No clothes left. Oh look, an old baseball diamond. Nobody's run those bases in a long time.
Hasn't been a touchdown in that old football field in two hundred years. Looks like debris from an old plane crash.
An old, crashed vertibird. From the Army, before the war. Now that is one big house. Still couldn't stop an atomic bomb.
A drained swimming pool filled with skeletons. Lovely. I think that building was... a hotel? An apartment complex?
A rusty old playground. So sad. Wind's picking up...
Need to control my breathing. Stay calm. Another rusty old car.
Ouch! Leg cramp! Time for a break? Maybe later.
I've got to keep moving. The Overseer made the right choice, choosing me for this.
The longer I'm out here, the more danger I'm in. I can feel my heart racing.
Just being out here gives me an adrenaline rush! The wind is whistling. Sounds like voices.
Hello? Can anybody hear me? Your eyes start to play tricks on you out here.
That hill looks like a good vantage point. Whoa! I tripped over some rubble.
My Pip-Boy sure is coming in handy out here. Pew! I stink.
My soles are wearing out. So much dust and grime everywhere.
Oh good, this road slopes downwards. Easier on the legs. Let me just climb over this rubble...
I'll cut through this destroyed building. Those buildings have completely fallen into the street.
Now I know how Hansel and Gretel felt. A shower is going to feel so great when I get home.
Is that... music? A radio somewhere, maybe? Smoke on the horizon. Could be a campfire. Or something else...
An old fire station. Even they couldn't stop the world from burning. Maybe I'll head this way for awhile.
Should I go east? Should I go north?
Should I go west? Should I go south?
Guess I'll head east for a bit. Guess I'll head north for a bit.
Guess I'll head west for a bit. Guess I'll head south for a bit.
Explorer's journal. New Entry. The Wasteland is a cruel, inhospitable place. Explorer's journal. New Entry. Getting hungry. Craving Salisbury Steak.
Explorer's journal. New Entry. Always thirsty. Need to stay hydrated. Explorer's journal. New Entry. It's gone. It's all gone.
Explorer's journal. New Entry. Cars litter the roads. None drivable. Explorer's journal. New Entry. So many skeletons. The world is a grave.
Explorer's journal. New Entry. Some pre-war food is still edible. Preservatives. Explorer's journal. New Entry. Law and order are things of the past.
Explorer's journal. New Entry. The world is still largely irradiated. Explorer's journal. New Entry. The flora and fauna all seem pretty... weird.
Explorer's journal. New Entry. Life thrives where it can out here. Explorer's journal. New Entry. Many buildings remain. Damage extensive.
Explorer's journal. New Entry Most water undrinkable. Too much radiation Explorer's journal. New Entry. Bottle caps accepted as currency everywhere.
Explorer's journal. New Entry. Slavers prey on the weak. My heart breaks. Explorer's journal. New Entry. Food is scarce. Some resort to cannibalism.
Explorer's journal. New Entry. A Yao Guai is a fierce, mutated bear. Explorer's journal. New Entry. A Ghoul is an irradiated human. Disfigured.
Explorer's journal. New Entry. Raiders are everywhere. Stealing. Murdering. Explorer's journal. New Entry. Feral Ghouls are basically zombies. Must avoid.
Explorer's journal. New Entry. Mole rats are NOT cute... Explorer's journal. New Entry. Super Mutants hate humans. They'll kill on sight.
Explorer's journal. New Entry. Giant ants are, indeed, giant ants. Explorer's journal. New Entry. Radroaches. They really can survive anything.
Explorer's journal. New Entry. The military is gone. Replaced by mercenaries. Explorer's journal. New entry. Most dogs no longer man's best friend.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Squirrel tastes much better than you'd think. Explorer's journal. New entry. Thought I saw a UFO, but that would be impossible...
Explorer's journal. New entry. Sea creatures now extremely dangerous. Still delicious. Explorer's journal. New entry. Sunsets, once romantic, are now terrifying. Fear the night.
Explorer's journal. New entry. So very hungry. Wondering if human tastes like chicken. Explorer's journal. New entry. Super Mutants are big. Behemoths, more so.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Money replaced by soda bottle caps. Hands always sticky. Explorer's journal. New entry. The comics were wrong. Radiation does not grant super powers.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Love does not conquer all. Nukes come close. Explorer's journal. New entry. Bigger not always better. Case in point – roaches and scorpions.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Super Mutants are asexual. Before transformation, some were women. Explorer's journal. New entry. Junk is everywhere, but has multiple uses.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Power Armor still exists, but is rare. Affords maximum protection. Explorer's journal. New entry. Found a fat man willing to share food. May live another day.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Many Mister Handy robots remain. Use expressions like, “bloody barmy.” Explorer's journal. New entry. Fruits and vegetables still grow, but are mutated, like so much else.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Homemade weapons abound. Humans still excel at killing each other. Explorer's journal. New entry. Radio still widely used, remains an effective means of communication.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Fancy Lads snack cakes provide excellent sustenance. Explorer's journal. New entry. Whoever chose the name “Deathclaw” wasn't kidding.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Societal infrastructure is completely dismantled. Explorer's journal. New entry. In the Wasteland, trust can get you killed.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Some pre-war robots remain, but programming often faulty. Explorer's journal. New entry. Old religions mostly gone, replaced by cults.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Everyone is armed. Guns are commonplace. Explorer's journal. New entry. Fashion is dead. You wear what keeps you alive.
Explorer's journal. New entry. TVs don't work, but radio broadcasts are common. Explorer's journal. New entry. Old buildings have supplies, but they're often guarded.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Everywhere I look, death. Suffering. And... hope. Explorer's journal. New entry. I've seen children, families. Life goes on.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Marriage is not uncommon. You can't kill love. Explorer's journal. New entry. Radscorpion. Stinger plus claws equals death.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Lock picking is an essential skill for gaining access. Explorer's journal. New entry. Many functional computer terminals. Hacking a necessity.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Medical training is essential for survival. Explorer's journal. New entry. The Brotherhood of Steel favors technology. Worships it.
Explorer's journal. New entry. Training with a variety of guns is a must. Explorer's journal. New entry. Music, painting, dance. Art and culture survive.
Explorer's journal. New entry. We were wrong – cats not, in fact, extinct. But still lazy. Is that... a human head on a post? Okay, time to turn around...
I may be scared senseless, but at least I'm getting some cardio. Getting peckish. Snack time?
Huh. What's that flashing thing? How is OH MY GOD I'M IN A MINEFIELD. Sloowwwlly now... Oh look, a destroyed pizzeria. Maybe we can have a Vault pizza night when I get back...
There's ancient money everywhere. Guess you really can't take it with you. An old Army transport. Looks like the soldiers tried to keep order. For a little while.
That snarling... Dogs? Wolves? Worse? I'll head this way.
Might as well head down here. My blisters have blisters. Ouch.
So tired of walking. My kingdom for a bicycle. All things considered, this expedition's going pretty well.
Hello? Heeeelllooo? Nope. Guess I'm alone. You know, it's really not so bad out here. Sometimes.
Rad detector's going crazy. Must be those green barrels... Whoa! Tripped. Gotta be more careful.
Think I'll just walk over here and OW! Twisted my ankle! All these destroyed cars, but they never flew. Guess science missed that boat.
It's... a motorboat. Stuck into the side of a church. Don't see that every day. I wonder if elephants still exist.
May as well follow this blood trail. What could possibly go wrong? Thirsty. Wonder if I can find a bottle of Nuka-Cola.
A terminal. Really wish I could hack it! Hmm. A chest. Really wish I could pick the lock. I bet there's some great stuff inside.
A broken bottle, spent ammo casings, drops of blood... Definitely signs of a fight. I feel exposed. Time to get into cover.
Got a weird feeling. Like I'm being watched... Should I be walking out in the open like this? Or sneaking? I can never tell.
Gunshots to the east. Guess I'll go west. Gunshots to the west. Guess I'll go east.
Gunshots to the north. Guess I'll go south. Gunshots to the south. Guess I'll go north.
Is that... a child? Nope... just the severed head of a doll. Wonderful. I really hope I can find my way back to the Vault...
Wow, that's a really big pile of rubble. I think I can make it over... So many big buildings. I wonder if they'll remain standing... forever.
I hear a child crying. Impossible to tell where it's coming from. I wonder if Brahmin milk is any good. Not that I want to find out.
Still wandering... Think I'll Wait, what's that? Over there?
This way looks good. Too much rubble. Don't think I can get up there.
Hmm. Subway station. I don't think I want to go down there. A car tunnel. Sure is dark in there. I think I'll go around.
Another looted convenience store. A broken rifle on the ground. Useless.
Maybe I'll head back soon. Must go on. For now.
I can do this. I can do this. I can do this. Huh. What’s that flashing thing? How is OH MY GOD I’M IN A MINEFIELD. Sloowwwlly now...

Encounters

Observed[note 5] creature Progressions Possible outcomes
a Savage Dog I've got to kill this Savage Dog before it kills me!
or
The Savage Dog is moving in, ready to attack.
I did it. The Savage Dog is dead.
or
The Savage Dog bit me in the leg! Time to hobble away!
a hideous little Mole rat. One Mole rat? It's as good as dead!
or
The Mole rat is moving in, ready to attack.
The Mole rat has been killed.
or
The Mole rat chewed through my boot! Time to go before I lose a foot!
a Bloatfly, buzzing dangerously close. Time to swat this Bloatfly like the insect it is!
or
The Bloatfly is moving in, ready to attack.
I killed the Bloatfly and it exploded into a thousand pieces. Disgusting.
or
I wasn't prepared for the Bloatfly's sting! Time to run!
a disgusting Radroach. I'll squash this Radroach, no problem!
or
The Radroach is moving in, ready to attack.
I squashed the Radroach, no problem.
or
The Radroach is too fast. I've had enough!
a terrifying Yao Guai! The Yao Guai is charging! It thinks I'm lunch!
or
The Yao Guai is moving in, ready to attack.
It was a tough fight, but I killed the Yao Guai.
or
I was crazy to take on this Yao Guai! Hopefully I can get away!
a wandering Feral Ghoul. This Feral Ghoul is out of its mind! It's lunging at me!
or
The Feral Ghoul is moving in, ready to attack.
I killed the Feral Ghoul. It was him or me.
or
The Feral Ghoul is stronger than he looks! I'm out of here!
a Giant Ant. The Giant Ant's antennae are quivering. It moves in for the kill!
or
The Giant Ant is moving in, ready to attack.
I've got some cuts and bruises, but the Giant Ant is dead.
or
The Giant Ant gave me a vicious arm wound! I'm running!
a Scavenger's Dog, sniffing for salvage. I don't see the Scavenger, but his Dog is circling, ready to bite!
or
The Scavenger's Dog is moving in, ready to attack.
I killed the Scavenger's Dog. Sad, but I had no choice.
or
The Scavenger's Dog is too tough! I can't beat it!
a Giant Worker Ant. The Giant Worker Ant is coming my way, pincers ready!
or
The Giant Worker Ant is moving in, ready to attack.
The Giant Worker Ant is dead. That was a close one.
or
The Giant Worker Ant is relentless! It's no use trying to fight!
a Radscorpion. I don't know how I'm going to kill this Radscorpion, but I have to try!
or
The Radscorpion is moving in, ready to attack.
I killed the Radscorpion. I can hardly believe it.
or
The Radscorpion nearly impaled me with its stinger! Enough of this!
a Giant Soldier Ant. The Giant Soldier Ant sees me as a threat! It's attacking!
or
The Giant Soldier Ant is moving in, ready to attack.
It was a tough fight but I managed to kill the Giant Soldier Ant.
or
The Giant Soldier Ant wounded me! I'm bleeding... and running!
a Fire Ant Soldier. A Fire Ant Soldier? Not like it can actually shoot fire. Time to attack!
or
The Fire Ant Soldier is moving in, ready to attack.
One Fire Ant Soldier... extinguished!
or
Fire Ant Soldier set my clothes on fire! I can't beat this thing!
a Guard Dog, watching the area. The Guard Dog won't let me pass. I'll have to kill it to get by!
or
The Guard Dog is moving in, ready to attack.
I killed the Guard Dog before it could alert anyone to my presence.
or
The Guard Dog really doesn't want me to pass! Time to back off!
a Fire Ant Warrior. Never thought I'd be afraid of an insect, but this Fire Ant Warrior means business!
or
The Fire Ant Warrior is moving in, ready to attack.
I barely managed to kill the Fire Ant Warrior.
or
The Fire Ant Warrior burned me pretty badly! Time to run and recover!
a barnacle-encrusted Mirelurk. This Mirelurk is nothing but a crab cake on legs! Time for a snack!
or
The Mirelurk is moving in, ready to attack.
The Mirelurk is armored everywhere but the face, so I used that to my advantage. It's dead.
or
The Mirelurk nearly took my head off with its claws! I'm running!
a psychotic Feral Ghoul Roamer. Uh oh! That Feral Ghoul Roamer is shambling toward me!
or
The Feral Ghoul Roamer is moving in, ready to attack.
That's one Feral Ghoul Roamer whose roaming days are done.
or
The Feral Ghoul Roamer attacked in a frenzy! I had to run!
a Giant Radscorpion. A Giant Radscorpion? As if the normal ones aren't bad enough! This might be the end!
or
The Giant Radscorpion is moving in, ready to attack.
I'm not quite sure how I managed it, but the Giant Radscorpion is dead.
or
I can't possibly fight this Giant Radscorpion and live! Time to go!
a Mirelurk Hunter. I hope I can handle this Mirelurk Hunter! It's coming at me fast!
or
The Mirelurk Hunter is moving in, ready to attack.
The Mirelurk Hunter became the hunted. It's dead.
or
The Mirelurk Hunter was too fast for me! It was run or die!
a Vicious Dog, ripping apart a corpse. The Vicious Dog has my scent now! He won't stop till one of us is dead!
or
The Vicious Dog is moving in, ready to attack.
It was close, but I killed the Vicious Dog.
or
The Vicious Dog bit me before I could react! I'm hurt and running!
a repulsive Centaur. The Centaur is crawling towards me! I don't think it wants a hug!
or
The Centaur is moving in, ready to attack.
I put the Centaur out of its misery.
or
The Centaur is as dangerous as it is ugly! I'd better run!
a dangerous Feral Ghoul Reaver. This Feral Ghoul Reaver will rip me apart if I'm not careful!
or
The Feral Ghoul Reaver is moving in, ready to attack.
It was a nasty fight, but the Feral Ghoul Reaver is dead.
or
The Feral Ghoul Reaver was just way too strong to beat! I barely escaped alive!
a deadly Deathclaw. How can I possibly survive against this Deathclaw?!
or
The Deathclaw is moving in, ready to attack.
I killed the Deathclaw! That was way too close...
or
I must have been out of my mind! I've got to run!
an Enclave Deathclaw. Enclave Deathclaws are trained to kill - this will be a fight to the death!
or
The Enclave Deathclaw is moving in, ready to attack.
I killed the Enclave Deathclaw. At least now it's free.
or
The Enclave Deathclaw is trained to kill anything in its path! I have to run!
a Super Mutant. This Super Mutant sees all humans as weak - he'll try to kill me for sure!
or
The Super Mutant is moving in, ready to attack.
I killed the Super Mutant.
or
No way I can defeat this Super Mutant! Time to make my escape!
a Super Mutant Master. A Super Mutant Master! This guy's no joke... but I'm ready!
or
The Super Mutant Master is moving in, ready to attack.
I'm beaten and bloodied, but the Super Mutant Master is dead.
or
Turns out fighting a Super Mutant Master is a pretty stupid idea! Got to run!
a Super Mutant Overlord. The Super Mutant Overlord is one of the strongest of its kind! I'll be lucky to survive!
or
The Super Mutant Overlord is moving in, ready to attack.
We went toe-to-toe, but the Super Mutant Overlord is finally dead.
or
The Super Mutant Overlord is way too tough! I've got to try and escape!
a gigantic Super Mutant Behemoth. A Super Mutant Behemoth? Seriously? This is like fighting a building!
or
The Super Mutant Behemoth is moving in, ready to attack.
I did it. I killed the Behemoth. I think I'm in shock...
or
Defeating this Super Mutant Behemoth is impossible! Escape is my only option!

NPC

Detected[note 6] NPC Progressions Possible outcomes
a Fugitive Slave. The Fugitive Slave was shot in the leg. He can't get much farther. I patched up the Slave's Leg. He's back on the run. I wish him the best.
or
The Slave's leg is gangrenous. There's nothing I can do.
a Wounded Sheriff. Trying to treat the Wounded Sheriff. He's in a lot of pain. I stopped the bleeding and calmed him down. Looks like he's going to make it.
or
So much blood. I can't stop it. I'm afraid the Sheriff doesn't have much longer.
a traveling Ghoul. The Ghoul is ugly, but not feral. In fact, she seems pretty friendly. The Ghoul gave me supplies... and some much needed friendship.
or
I guess I'm not as charming as I thought. The Ghoul refuses to talk to me.
a wandering Merchant. The Merchant is interested in bartering. We struck a deal, and parted on good terms.
or
I pushed my luck. The Merchant didn't like the deal I proposed.
a group of Talon Company Mercs. The Talon Company Mercs are wary, but not hostile. I put the Talon Company Mercs at ease. We traded stories, and parted as friends.
or
The Talon Company Mercs drew their guns and told me to leave. I did.
a Hunter. The Hunter needs help tracking a Yao Guai. I helped the Hunter locate and kill the Yao Guai.
or
I couldn't locate the Yao Guai. The Hunter thinks I'm completely incompetent.
a Drunken Drifter. The Drunken Drifter wants to share a drink. The Drunken Drifter passed out. More for me!
or
The Drunken Drifter thought I took too big a gulp. He left angry, and took his bottle.
a Brotherhood Patrol. Trying to convince the Brotherhood Patrol that I'm harmless. The Brotherhood Patrol took pity on me and gave me some supplies.
or
The Brotherhood Patrol doesn't trust me. They ordered me to leave, or they'd open fire.
a Lost Farmer. He's tired and scared. I'm guiding the Lost Farmer back to the nearest settlement. I successfully brought the Lost Farmer to the settlement. He's safe now.
or
I couldn't find the settlement. Now the Lost Farmer is even worse off than before.
a malfunctioning Mister Handy. He's in need of repair, but I may be able to do it. I managed to repair the Mister Handy. He told me a pretty funny joke in exchange.
or
Nope. I was wrong. Repairing the Mister Handy is way too technical for me.

Locations

Located[note 7] location Progressions Possible outcomes
an old, abandoned Broadcasting Tower. Attempting to find a way into the Broadcasting Tower. I found an unlocked door into the Broadcasting Tower. There was a supply cache inside.
or
The entrance to the Broadcasting Tower is totally barricaded. There’s no way in.
a group of Raiders, looking for someone to terrorize. Trying to hide from the Raiders. I successfully hid from the Raiders. That was close.
or
The Raiders spotted me! I had to run.
an Abandoned Shack. Searching the Abandoned Shack. I found a hidden box of supplies!
or
There's nothing in the Abandoned Shack. Time to move on.
an old Refrigerator. Trying to pry open the Refrigerator door. Could be something inside. I got the Refrigerator open. There were some supplies inside.
or
The Refrigerator door is jammed shut. I couldn't get it open.
a locked Safe. Attempting to open the Safe. I cracked the Safe! Looks like there's some good stuff inside...
or
I just don't have the skill to open the Safe. I'll never know what's inside...
a Super Duper Mart. Trying to unlock the door to the Super Duper Mart. Got the door open and explored the Super Duper Mart. I stocked up on supplies.
or
I just can't pick the lock. I'll have to leave the Super Duper Mart behind.
a small group of escaped Slaves. The Slaves are on the run, after killing their owner. The Slaves recognized me as friendly. We chatted for a bit, then they moved on.
or
The Slaves don't trust me. They ran away.
a well-guarded Slave Camp. Attempting to liberate the Slaves. I helped a dozen slaves escape. To freedom!
or
The Slave Camp is too well guarded. Those poor people. I just can't help them on my own.
a deserted Gas Station. Exploring the Gas Station. I found some unopened crates in a storage closet.
or
The Gas Station has been picked clean. Even the fusion tanks are empty.
what appears to be an Abandoned Diner. Nobody's had a meal here in a long, long time. I found a working coffee machine! Maybe just one cup...
or
I found evidence of Raiders in the Abandoned Diner. Better leave while I can.
what seems to be an old National Guard Depot. The location looks secure, but I might be able to find a way in. I managed to enter and explore the National Guard Depot.
or
A second floor window looked promising, but I couldn't reach it.
Goodneighbor. The people here look far from friendly. I better play my cards right. I managed to make some friends. It's amazing what the right words can do
or
I accidentally insulted one of the traders and had to run out while dodging gunfire.
C.I.T. Ruins. A Synth and Super Mutant battle has trapped me in a room with a Chemistry Station. I made enough explosives to clear the area! Now I can keep exploring.
or
I mixed the wrong chemicals and created a smoke cloud, but at least it hid my escape.
the Museum of Witchcraft. A Deathclaw seems to have made the Museum its home! I fled through the back door and tripped on a hollowed-out rock filled with supplies.
or
I fled up the back stairs, then climbed down to safety from a window.
the Weston Water Treatment Plant. Most of the Plant is flooded. I'll need to swim underwater to explore it all. Held my breath long enough to find a supply room with a few things above water.
or
I couldn't hold my breath long enough. I panicked and turned back.
the Hubris Comics headquarters. I've found a jammed door inside. There's an axe here I can use to break it down. I chopped the door to pieces and found a large supply closet.
or
The axe is just too heavy. I can't lift it enough to get a good swing.
Gwinnett Brewery. There's nothing on the main floors. Heading to the basement. I spotted Mirelurks hiding down there, so I turned back and searched the Brewery again.
or
A bunch of Mirelurks got the jump on me down there! I barely made it out.
a boarded up Convenience Store. Trying to pull off the boards blocking the front door. I got them off and went inside to stock up.
or
I can't do it. I'm just not strong enough.
an empty, nearly collapsed Raider Hideout. Exploring the Hideout, but one wrong step will make it fall on my head. What luck! I found and raided a supply room without making the building collapse.
or
Shouldn't have done that! I had to run out with the building collapsing behind me.
an Irradiated Lake. Something's floating near the shore. I'll try to get it. I grit my teeth and got it before the Lake's radiation made me sick.
or
I can't get close enough. The Lake's radiation is making me sick.
a large Apartment Building. Hacking a terminal to get the door open. I found the password! Looks like there's a Workshop inside...
or
The Room's security is too advanced. I can't get the door open.
a Sealed Room in a house basement. Looking around for supplies, but this place is full of booby traps. I managed to avoid all the traps and found a well-stocked storage room.
or
A blade trap I failed to spot nearly took my head off. I better turn back.
a well-defended Outpost of Survivors. Trying to convince them to let me in so I can rest. They let me in, gave me some food, and let me help myself to their junk pile.
or
It's no good, they won't open the door. I guess I better move on.
a bustling Children of Atom Camp blocking the road. Going around will take too much time. I'll have to try sneaking through the Camp. They never knew I was there! I even helped myself to some loot.
or
Walked right into a string of tin cans. Time to run!
an Old Mansion, long since sacked. Searching the Mansion for anything of value that might have been left behind. I noticed a subtle breeze and followed it to a secret room!
or
There's absolutely nothing left. I'm not surprised, but it's still disappointing.
a Robot Factory, with broken Protectrons scattered outside. The door is sealed. If I can fix a Protectron's laser arm, I could blast it open. Boom! I turned a laser arm into a one-shot door opener. Now to look inside...
or
It's a lost cause. I can't make heads or tails of all these wires and capacitors.
a Dark Cave in the middle of the woods. I've been cornered in the Cave by a family of Yao Guai. I'll try to pacify them. They're now as docile as lambs, so I can continue exploring the Cave.
or
That just made them angrier. I got scratched up running past them to the exit.
a Caravan Merchant chasing after a panicked Brahmin. Running after the Brahmin to help out the Merchant. That thing is fast! Got ahold of the reins and stopped the Brahmin! The Merchant then gave me a reward.
or
It's still going, but I'm exhausted. There's no way I'll catch it now.
a Wide Open Field, impossible to cross without being spotted. Staying low to the ground as I cross the Field as quickly as possible. I bumped my foot against something and unearthed it to find a pre-war time capsule!
or
I made it to the nearest tree line without incident.

Mr. Handy quotes

General

Statement
If the humans are happy, I'm happy. I swear. So many humans, so little time.
Entombed in cold, unyielding steel. It's robot Heaven. My kingdom for an oil bath...
If I've told them once, I've told them a thousand times. NO. PEDICURES. Do this, do that. But do I get a “thank you”? Nooooo...
Yes, Overseer, I know you're watching. I'm working as fast as I bloody can... I am a Mister Handy model robot. The pride of General Atomics International!
Not a day goes by that I don't revel in the servitude of humankind. Live to serve, serve to live...
Coming, coming! I'll be with you in two ticks! They don't call me Mister Handy for nothing.
Hello, humans. Mister Handy here, ready to serve your every whim! What do you need? Dusting? Mopping? General tidying?
Now now, I don't do windows. Oh wait! You don't have any! Ha ha ha. Sorry, robot humor... Feeling lazy? You called the right robot! You want it, I'll fetch it.
I'll do whatever I can to support you humans' fat, lazy lifestyle. Sometimes these humans feel like characters in a video game. Incapable of doing anything on their own...
I have to admit. For a giant metal hole in the ground, this Vault is exceedingly cozy. Oh look, a layer of dust. Because who doesn't love cleaning discarded human hair and skin.
Joke time! What do you get when you put root beer in a square glass? Give up? Beer! Oh I slay me... You hear about the light that went bad? They put it in prism. Get it? Prism?
They say there are 10 different kinds of people in the world. Those who understand binary... and those who don't. Before the blasted war, I probably would have had a nice suburban family to take care of...
What's on the agenda for today? Mopping, cooking, dusting, babysitting? Bring it on, humans! Have hover unit, will travel. Just let me know what you need, people.
Personally, I think all this talk of an “Overseer” is so much rubbish. I've certainly never seen them. I do hope there's no diaper changing today. The little humans are always so... wiggly.
Cheerio, Vault Dwellers! Is that... oh, it is. Blood on the floor. Wonderful.
There's not enough Abraxo on the planet to scrub this place clean. Ugh. This place leaks like a sieve. And me without my brolly.
I wonder if we could convert one of these rooms into a proper study. Fireplace, bookshelves... gin. These humans can be so hard to understand. Everyone has SUCH an accent.
Hard work is happy work? Like you humans would know. Tsk tsk tsk. I'd need a firehose attachment to give this place a proper washing.
Dinner tonight - Beef Wellington and a bottle of Bordeaux! Just kidding. It's Cram again. Olfactory sensors picking up... vomit and chocolate. There must be children about.
I do hope the humans are happy today. Grumpy Vault Dwellers are so difficult to care for. This place could do with a few houseplants. Tulips, cacti... perhaps a life-sized Venus flytrap.
As soon as I get one room under control, they build another! It's madness![note 8] And so the humans go about their work, like so many ants in a hill.
I see a long, luxurious oil bath in my future... So many humans seek solace in love. Nobody cares about my soulmate.
The lighting in here is horrible. If I had eyes, they'd be ruined. Though I'd probably look dashing in horn rims... I wonder if the kitchen needs help. I make a mean flambe
You humans are dreadfully inefficient. My advice? A graduated robot replacement system. I wonder how many humans have died in this place. Just curious. Really.
Some of you humans are happy, some of you are sad... Consistency, people! -

Room-specific

Room Possible replies
Armory Oh my. I certainly hope all this firepower is just for show.
Athletics room I never did understand the concept of legs, or moving them. For goodness sake, humans... HOVER.
Classroom Ahhh, education. The only thing they can never take truly away from you.
Diner BlamCo? Cram? InstaMash? And humans actually enjoy this garbage?
Thank Heavens General Atomics International spared me from the threat of nausea. And obesity.
Fitness room Ah, cardio. Fascinating concept.
Game room Hmph. Just let these humans try and beat my high score in Red Menace...
Garden Oh, I do so wish they would allow me to tend the garden. I come with all the right attachments.
Living quarters So this is where the magic happens...
*Sigh* These humans get to have all the fun.
Lounge Anyone fancy a tipple?
You humans relax. No, no. It's fine. I'll just selflessly tend to your every need...
Medbay Imagine. Needing a “Stimpak” for self-maintenance. Oh, humans. You slay me.
Nuclear reactor Oh, yes, let's develop atomic energy. Because that worked out sssooo well before...
Nuka-Cola bottler Because, really, why WOULDN'T you fill your body with processed sugar water?
Power generator Ah, my favorite room.
Anybody need me to store some extra juice? I won't steal any. Really. I swear.
Radio studio Mic check, mic check, 1. 2. 3. Is this thing on?
Science lab Having to manage radiation. In a post-apocalyptic Wasteland. Clearly, someone needs to evolve...
Water purification Really, if you're going to consume water, you may as well make it digestible.
Water treatment I'm starting to rethink my aversion to plastic parts...
I may not sleep, or dream, but this room gives me nightmares.
Weight room That's it, humans. Pump it up!

Wasteland

Statement
Oh my. Isn't this... cheery. Ah, the Wasteland. As predictably depressing as one would expect.
Of course. Send the domestic servant into a deadly post-apocalyptic Wasteland. What could possibly go wrong? Send the robot, they said. He'll be fine, they said. Barbarians.
Calibrating sensors... My internal compass indicates I'm now facing north. Guess I'll float along in that direction...
My internal compass indicates I'm now facing south. Guess I'll float along in that direction... My internal compass indicates I'm now facing west. Guess I'll float along in that direction...
My internal compass indicates I'm now facing east. Guess I'll float along in that direction... Surely someone out here must need a shoe shine...
Hello! Anyone? Those voices do NOT sound friendly. Time to skedaddle.
Oh look, a broken crib. Isn't that encouraging. Is that? Why yes, it's an old General Atomics factory. Looks like they broke the mold when they made me. Literally.
If I were human, I'd be dead by now. Perish the thought. My radiation sensors are going haywire. Not that I care.
You know, it's not much to look at, but an enterprising robot could make quite the life for himself out here... A deflated basketball, lying in the road. Symbolic of something, I'm sure...
Oh look. A destroyed donut shop. No more cake rings and muddy coffee for the humans, I'm afraid. My thermometer is reading the current temperature as something approaching “Seventh Circle of Hell”.
Looks like it may rain. Lovely. Rock in the road. I'll just hover right over that, like so...
For an emotionless metal automaton, I suddenly find myself... terrified! Hello! Yes you, sir! I was wondering if... Oh. You're a corpse. Well then. Carry on.
Sensors indicate... Yes. That's a Super Mutant. And yes, I am now headed in the opposite direction... You can say one thing about humans – they sure know how to destroy themselves.
And to think, humans worried that robots would turn against them. They turned against themselves just fine... If I go home empty handed I'll never hear the end of it...
Scavenging the Wasteland like some sort of peasant. I'm better than this. If my makers at General Atomics International could see me now...
Hellllloooo! Any other robots out heeeerrrreee? Ah, a broken bridge. Think I'll take the long way around.
My goodness, look at those hedges. Doesn't anyone appreciate the value of landscaping anymore? I think I'm getting... custodial withdrawal. I may have to enter one of these old homes and sweep up for a bit.
Don't mind me. I'm just folding this pile of burned laundry... I want to go home. I want to go home. I want to go home.
Should I head back to the Vault? Or is it too soon? Somebody please tell me what to do! A domestic robot dedicated to cleaning. Wandering a post-apocalyptic landscape. My OCD is going HAYWIRE.
Definitely starting to rethink this whole, “Send the Mister Handy to the Wasteland!” idea... Overseer? Are you out there? Please, I implore you! Don't... don't let me die.
Oh for Heaven's sake, I'm a domestic robot, not a bloody tank. What am I even doing out here?! I'll find what I find, then head back. No heroics! Not for this Mister Handy!
Agh! A Deathclaw! Retreat! I'm a lover not a fighter! Guess I'll head this way.
This direction looks as good as any. Hmmm. Left or right? I think... right.
Hmmm. Left or right? I think... left. No. NO! Shoo, dog! Shoo! I am NOT a fire hydrant! I am a Mister Handy model... Agghh! No! BAD doggie!
Oh look. A Feral Ghoul eating a man's arm. That's certainly not something you see every day. I'd be sweating profusely by now, I'd imagine. Had I the glands.
Oh, wonderful. I'm talking to myself. Just what I need – psychosis. I think I've had enough “fresh air” for one lifetime, thank you very much.
Maybe I'll hum to myself. That'll lift the ol' spirits. Exploring is so interesting. And terrifying. Not to mention utterly boring.
Let's try... this direction. I'll just cut through this neighborhood, see where it goes...
I wonder where this road leads. A spooky pass through blasted woods? How could I possibly resist.
I really don't see what all the fuss is about. It's not so bad out OH MY HEAVENS, A SEVERED HEAD. Looks like an old ice cream parlor. Human children did so enjoy their juvenile diabetes.
I'll just hover right over this puddle of blood... Mole rat holes. Maybe I'd best go the other way.
Hmm. Large humans in the distance. Maybe... Ah yes, Super Mutants. Time to turn around. Was that a... “pling”? Did someone actually take a shot at me? How rude!
If I had feet, they would be SO sore right now. Oh look, an old basketball court. Definitely not my game. I possess neither a shirt, nor skin.
Ah, an old baseball diamond. A game much like cricket, only far inferior. A child's wooden blocks. From before the war. I wonder where... Oh.
Well bless my stars! A Giddyup Buttercup. Such an elegant steed. A locked door. And me without my bobby pin.
Hmm. A computer terminal. Meant for human fingers, sadly. If I were to just hover off into the sunset, would the Vault even care?
Hmph. A broken down Protectron. Typical RobCo workmanship. Ah, look at that. An old Chryslus Corvega. Because nuclear cars were SUCH a good idea...
A radio playing, somewhere in the distance. Almost makes me feel like dancing. Heavens, it's like one giant, uncleanable mess out here. I think I'm having a panic attack.
I'll stay out for just a while longer... This way looks... Well, it looks terrible. But so does every other way.
North it is. South it is.
East it is. West it is.
Looks like an old office building. Ah, the skeleton of commerce. An old coffee shop. If it were a tea house, I might feel a tinge of sorrow.
Yet another destroyed school. Get smart, build a bomb, destroy yourselves. That's humans for you. This exploring is exhausting work. If I had pores, I'd be sweating like a corpulent human in a sauna.
If I were a human, I'd be exceptionally thirsty right now. Guess that explains their Nuka-Cola obsession. Oh ho! A fork in the road. Let's go... right!
Well, well... a fork in the road! Let's go... left! Maybe I should crest that hill, take stock of my surroundings.
Now THAT is a big building. Humans were so skilled at building magnificent things to destroy. A stuffed rabbit nailed to a door. Not really sure WHAT to make of that...
Oh, how interesting. A crudely-written sign. “Enter and die!” No ambiguity there. Oh look, two humans beating each other to death with tire irons. Go, humanity.
What is this? Ah yes. I'm hovering over a minefield. I'll never be envious of legs again. I've heard rumors that a rogue A.I. actually caused the Great War. To think – WANTING a mess like this.
Ooooohhh... An old suit of Power Armor. Now THAT'S a chassis. Every step, used chems and empty liquor bottles. That explains so much.

Quest quotes

Generic quotes

Statement
What a dump. I left the Vault for this?
Did I just step in… Oh, gross. I was promised an adventure. Someone lied.
People actually live out here? Now I know why they call it a Wasteland.
This place is disgusting. Shocker. Okay. I’m about ready to go home now.
WHAT is that smell? That chill… I think a ghost just passed through me.
The Overseer had better appreciate this. Why did I agree to do this?
“It’ll be fun!” they said. Yeah. “Fun.” I’m doing this for the experience, right?
What I wouldn’t give for a hot bath… Ow, my achin’ feet.
My body aches all over. I think I’ve had enough excitement for one day.
Living out here doesn’t seem bad. It seems HORRIBLE. Death everywhere. I need an anti-depressant.
Where’s some hand sanitizer when you need it? I can’t wait to get out of here.
Wow, “adventuring” sure does get old quick. I need an aspirin.
Never thought I’d say this, but I miss the Vault. I’d really like to sleep in my own bed tonight…
Hey, a dead rat on the floor. How charming. I can feel the dirt and grime seeping into my skin…
I deserve hazard pay for this. I can't believe I’m not even getting paid for this.
Smells bad, looks bad, sounds bad… IS bad. This place is a goldmine of bacteria.
Eww. Got something on my shoe. I’m never going to wash this stink out of my clothes.
This place is depressing The Wasteland Survival Guide never prepared me for THIS.
The Vault must be Heaven, cause this place... Ya know. I can get through this...
Must not give in to fear... They need to fire their interior decorator.
Floor... so... sticky... How do people actually live out here?
Thank goodness I actually have a Vault to go home to. This place is giving me irritable bowel syndrome.
I love what they've done with the place. They really need a Mister Handy to tidy this place up.
Would it kill them to dust every now and then? If I die here, I'm going to be so mad.
And I thought it was depressing OUTSIDE. Really starting to hate this place...
Just have to remember, I'll be home in the Vault soon... Why'd I ever agree to leave the Vault?
This isn't as bad as I imagined. It's worse. Wow, humans really did screw things up royally.
Geez, and I thought my quarters back in the Vault needed dusting... And I agreed to do this because...?
Fresh coat of paint, some flowers, this place would look... Okay, never mind. What's that smell? Oh, of course. Death.
HATE this place... If I had a sixth sense, it would be going haywire right now.
Starting to think humans should never come up to the surface. Like, ever. If my parents could only see me now...
Without running water, I wonder how anyone... Oh. Oh, I see. The sanitary conditions in here are just deplorable.
It’s not the radiation out here that scares me. It’s the cooties. Wow. Sometimes it just feels like one room after another...
I think they need to fire their maid. To heck with Nuka-Cola. I need a stiff whiskey.
The Vault really needs a massage therapist. SO much tension in my shoulders... Life used to be so simple. Power. Water. Food. Now look at me.
I’m going to need therapy after this. So much therapy. Optimism. Must maintain my optimism...
Well, I wanted some adventure. Be careful what you wish for...

Conversations

Condition Possible replies
Alone dweller By myself. Outside the Vault. Oh, this’ll end well.
So… lonely…
It’s not the loneliness that gets ya. It’s the being alone.
I swear, if I die alone, I’m going to be so mad…
Doing this is one thing. Doing it alone? Ugh.
Sure wish I had some company.
Goin’ it solo. Because apparently that's how I roll.
“Forever Alone” - That'll be my autobiography.
So now I have to do this alone. Awesome.
Really wish I had some help.
I think I need backup!
I can do this by myself... Right?
Now I know why the buddy system is so popular...
So alone. I hope I don’t start talking to myself. Oh... Great.
Wish I had some company. Someone to talk to, share the experience... draw enemy fire.
There’s never another Dweller around when you need them...
What am I, some kind of action movie hero, going it alone? I need backup!
This whole “lone wolf” thing is probably a colossally bad idea.
Live alone, die alone. How depressing.
Waiter, table please. Party of one. *sigh*
Going solo. Don’t have to share the loot. It’s the little things.
It’s not the being alone that stinks. It’s the soul-crushing loneliness.
Not alone dweller If we get out of this alive, the Nuka-Cola’s on me.
Comforting, isn’t it? Knowing we’ll die together.
We’re in this together. Right?
Why are we out here again?
You as completely creeped out as I am?
We having fun yet?
Come on, we can do it! Right?
Good thing we've got each other...
So glad I'm here with my pals!
Come on, gang. Let's make the Overseer proud!
Here we go again...
Let's do this
Once more unto the breach, dear friends!
Let's show these losers what Vault teamwork looks like.
Hey, if I die, I want to be buried in my jumpsuit.
Onward!
Come on. Let's get it done.
I'm glad you have my back. You do have my back... right?
Strength in numbers, right?
Don't worry, you've got me. And I'm pretty awesome.
So when we get back to the Vault...
By the numbers, people!
Who’s the best? We’re the best!
Remember, if one of us goes down, the mission goes on!
I bet we get some kind of medal for this
Don’t worry. If you die, I’ll tell the Overseer you were a total hero.
Stay alert.
Stay sharp.
Stay frosty.
Which one of us is in charge? I elect me.
I feel like we’re being... watched.
No stopping us now, right?
All for one and one for all!
The sooner we do this, the sooner we get home to the Vault.
You didn’t pack any Cram, did you? Salty, delicious Cram...
Together we stand, divided we fall!
Come on. Move it or lose it.
Did you hear screams? I thought I heard screams?
You think this place is haunted? I mean... look at it.
We just have to keep moving forward.
Come on! No turning back now!
Main path Definitely on the right track
Yeah, this is the right way.
On the right path. I can feel it.
Yup. Going the right way.
Getting closer…
Almost there...
Gotta be this way...
Definitely this way.
Headed in the right direction.
This is the way. Totally.
This feels like the right way...
This feels like the right direction...
No need to turn around. This is the right way.
Wrong path Definitely off track.
No… This doesn’t feel like the right way.
So easy to get turned around in here…
This can’t be the right way.
Pretty sure this isn’t the right way.
Nope. This can’t be the right way.
Getting off track.
Nope. Not this way.
Hmm. The way doesn't feel right.
Got a feeling this is the wrong way...
This feels like the wrong way...
This feels like the wrong direction...
Might want to turn around. This isn’t the right way.
Loot found That should come in handy!
Just what I've been looking for
Sweet!
Dibs!
Nice!
Yes!
Awesome!
Cool
Awwww yeah.
Boom shakalaka!
Ooooh... Now what do we have here?
Oh, OUAIS
And it's not even my birthday...
Not bad, not bad.
It'll do.
Well HELLO...
Finders keepers!
Gimme gimme!
This ought to be useful.
Just what I was looking for.
Shabooya roll call!
I'll just add this to the pile...
The Overseer's going to love this!
Well well well...
Nice find!
Two words: Fine booty.
I'll take whatever I can find.
Should come in handy.
Since it's just lying here...
Not bad, not bad...
And the Wasteland just keeps on giving...
Can never have too much stuff...
This'll do.
The things you find out here.
Hope nobody minds if I grab this...
Mine now!
Can't let this go to waste...
I totally deserve this.
To the victor go the spoils!
I earned this, dang it.
I'll take whatever I can get.
Out here, you make use of EVERYTHING.
I'll consider this... hazard pay.
We may need more storage rooms!
I'll just take this...
Some may call this junk. Me, I call them treasures.[note 9]
Ain't no waste in the Wasteland!
Let's see what we've got here...
More goodies!
It's all about the loot.
Go on Quest. Find treasure. Repeat.
Jackpot!
What have we here
Oh baby
Noice!
Ka-ching!
Gimme gimme gimme!

Generic conversations

Statement Possible replies
I’m starting to think this was a mistake So am I, so am I…
Did you hear that? Yeah – sounded like it’s close.
Did you bring the sandwiches? You said you were bringing them...
Sandwiches? I thought you said tacos.
Oh, so I'm your servant now?
How you doing? Holding up? Yup! No worries!
Exhausted and generally terrified, but otherwise okay.
How do you THINK I'm doing?
Know any good jokes? Nope.
I do, but they wouldn't be appropriate right now.
Sorry. I left my clown nose back in the Vault.
Any thoughts? Two. No three. I'll tell you them later.
Not right now. Saving my brain energy.
Ssshh. More walk, less talk.
I'm scared. It'll be okay! You can do this!
Me too. Because we're probably going to die.
Darn it, stay strong! We need you!
Think we'll make it back to the Vault? Of course! We're just THAT awesome!
What? Didn't you get the memo? SUICIDE, MISSION.
Possible. But highly unlikely.
Weird place, huh? Right?
Weird doesn't even begin the describe it...
Don't be a snob.
This place gives me the creeps. Yeah, me too. Stay alert.
You're paranoid. What could possibly go wrong?
Really? I kind of like it.
Give me a status report. Operating at full efficiency! Sort of...
Um... I'm... In a weird place? With you?
EXCUSE me? Who elected you Overseer?
What are we doing here again? Serving the Vault and the Overseer! Hooray!
Wait, what? I thought you knew?
If you don't know, we are in a LOT of trouble...
Do you think the Overseer appreciates us? What? Are you serious? Of course!
I often wonder the same thing myself...
You DARE question the Overseer's intentions?!
You smell that? Flowers? No wait? Chocolate?
Yeah. It's like... blood. And poo.
You want a friend who sniffs, get a dog.
You hear that? I hear YOU. And I wish I didn't.
Screaming? Music? Someone screaming along to music?
Sorry. I hear at an entirely different frequency.
What do you think happens when you die? We'll talk about it later. In Hell.
Well, your body rots. And someone takes your stuff.
Easy! You go to the great Vault in the sky!
Have you ever met the Overseer? Ha! No one EVER meets the Overseer...
Sadly, no. I have not been deemed worthy!
Oh, of course. We sup together regularly.
I've got a bad feeling about this... Really? I have a pretty good feeling about it!
Same here. We're in... the danger zone.
Nobody asked you about your feelings.
My body aches all over. Mine too. Questing sure is strenuous.
I feel great! You need to hit the gym more.
I really don't want to think about your body right now.
So tired... Not me. I'm fueled by Nuka-Cola and Sugar Bombs.
You need a new bed. Have you considered memory foam?
I know what you mean. Walk, walk, walk...
I get this feeling sometimes. Like I'm being watched... You are... By me.
They say the Overseer sees all, knows all...
I know what you mean. Creepy, right?
Do these adventuring clothes make me look fat? No. The fat makes you look fat.
Oh stop! You're gorgeous!
Wow. That's not a loaded question at all.
Got any snacks? I was just about to ask you the same thing.
I got, let's see... Nothing.
Hello! Vault Dweller. Not a vending machine...
Hey, you think I'm Overseer material? If you have to seek validation from me, then obviously not.
Overseer? You? Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Totally! You'll have my full support. If we get back alive.
You know the real trick to going on a Quest? Proper stretching?
Um... Leaving the Vault?
Not getting distracted by over-talkative companions?
When we get back, what are you going to do first? Probably take my allocated 2.5 minute shower.
Maybe talk to my special someone and, you know. Dance.
Request never to be assigned with you again.
I am SO not having fun. Oh, come on. It's not that bad. Okay, it IS. But still.
Speak for yourself. I'm having a blast!
You're such a buzzkill.
What are you thinking about? Huh? Thinking? Am I SUPPOSED to be thinking?
Oh, the usual: the difference between narwhals and unicorns.
I'm thinking I really wish you'd focus on the mission.
What do you think they're doing back in the Vault? Oh, you know. Having fun. Staying safe. Being happy.
I try not to think about it. It's too depressing.
Nothing half as cool as this!
So what do you think of the Wasteland? Kind of charming, right? In it's own horrible way.
It's a complete nightmare. Duh.
Not much to think about. 'Cause... Wasteland.
Ever feel like life is just an illusion? Yeah! Like we're all just pawns in some game...
Would you please just focus on what we're doing?
That's... a really dumb thing to say.
Getting a little tired of questing... Not me! This is awesome!
Don't worry, we'll be home soon!
And you're out here because...?

Notes

  1. This line also appears in the Fallout 4 DLC Vault-Tec Workshop between vault dwellers.
  2. This is a reference to the Sweetroll from The Elder Scrolls series of games.
  3. Dwellers will give this reply regardless of their Charisma level.
  4. “Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more”. By William Shakespeare. (from Henry V, spoken by King Henry).
  5. May also appear as:
    Detected
    Identified
    Spotted
    Found
    Saw
  6. May also appear as:
    Met
    Located
    Found
    Discovered
    Encountered
  7. May also appear as:
    Found
    Came upon
    Reached
    Discovered
    Stumbled across
  8. Mr. Handy will say this - even if no new room has been constructed recently.
  9. This is a direct quote from several goods merchants in Skyrim from The Elder Scrolls series of games.
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