The Rose Room Review is a paper note in Fallout 76, introduced in the Expeditions: Atlantic City update part two, America's Playground.
Location[]
The note can be found on a shelf behind the counter of the bar at the Rose Room.
Transcript[]
ROSE ROOM REVIEW
Review by Bibbius Snibbius
The Rose Room? More like the RUSSET Room, since this place is more of a ground tuber than a flower! As Appalachia's premier pseudonymous food critic and cuisine connoisseur, I made my way to the so-called "Rose Room" expecting a level of class not usually seen in this mountainous region. After all, the owners claim to be from Atlantic City, a bastion of civilization famed for its "high roller" lifestyle and luxurious accommodations.
The trek to the old "mansion", if it can even be called that, was onerous and dull. I hardly felt like the patron of a high-end establishment heading there, and more like a pilgrim performing some religious patronage for a brahmin steak and a whiskey.
Once I finally arrived at the "club", I was thoroughly disappointed in the architecture and atmosphere. It was inexcusably dirty, had clearly not been renovated, and the drapes were so abominable they could've been a second doomsday in of themselves.
I was greeted by a blonde woman in a garish dress who called herself Evelyn Russo and claimed to be the owner and proprietor of the Rose Room. I attempted to question her as to why she chose a rhododendron garnish for my molerat pate when everyone knows molerat pate is paired with mirelurk caviar. She looked at me as if I was a loon, and told me to just relax and enjoy the music.
Music! Oh, how Dean Domino would do barrel rolls in his grave to hear that drivel be called MUSIC! The only redeeming quality of it was the rather superb tuba-playing. Beyond that, some gas station knock-off of a lounge singer walked on stage and started crooning. By all that is holy and unholy, I did not need to hear what a scorchbeast in labor sounds like.
Not only were my ears bleeding, but every single one of my billions of taste buds were personally offended by the watered-down alcoholic beverages and flavorless "meals." The bartender, some young man with a haircut far trendier than him, came out and tried to placate me, offering a discount.
Why, never in all of my years as a food critic have I taken a BRIBE! I looked this man, "Vin", in the face and told him so! I let him know with no minced words that I shall be writing a review of this hovel, and no amount of caps could possibly sway my mind!
So here I am, penning yet another acclaimed review. The Rose Room is NOT worth your time or caps. I would rate it zero stars out of five. In fact, I would remove every single star from the sky myself, one by one, so that there are no stars left to give such a lackluster experience.
Until the next review, my dear readers. Let's hope it's not as pedestrian as this one.
Gallery[]
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