U.S.S.A. Emergency Protocols
=== In Case of Emergency ===
Help> Communist Takeover
In the likely event of an attempted Communist Takeover, you are instructed to follow these procedures:
1. Alert all crew-members that a Communist has been identified.
2. Insert Communist into the Red Scare Chair.
3. Push the blinking buttons in the following order: Red, White, Blue.
4. Hit the Star button.
As the Communist is ejected into space, salute them and remind them that this was their choice.
Help> Crash Landings
Follow these Procedures:
1. File all outstanding reports to the U.S.S.A.
2. Sync your suit's beacon to the PANDORA Bot.
3. Do not consume additional astronaut food.
4. Put your head between your knees.
Help> Emergency Escape Pods
In the unlikely scenario that the ship encountered significant trouble, the emergency escape pods will be ejected.
If you do not fit in the Emergency Escape Pod, you will almost certainly be incinerated upon entering the atmosphere.
Help> What is the PANDORA Bot?
The ship's automated pilot (PANDORA Bot Units) will attempt to return the escape pod to the nearest U.S.S.A. Facility that has offered assistance.
NOTICE: Upon crashing, your ship's PANDORA Bot will assume its primary objective to seek the nearest U.S.S.A. Facility. Let it find us so we can find you.
Help> Out of Food/Water/Air
If you have run out of food, water, or air, or are about to do so, then follow these procedures:
1. Enter a Deep Sleep Pod.
2. Do NOT remove another Astronaut from their Deep Sleep Pods.
3. Alert Ground Control of your gluttony.
4. Set the Timer to 1 year.
5. Do NOT consume Serum Z, it will not help.