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This is a transcript for dialogue with Eclair.


GREETING GREETING Happy 50 You're my hero, mister. I want to be just like you when I grow up. 1
GREETING Anger 15 Great, RJ let in another pair of choppers to eat up all our food. 2
Neutral 50 Well, as long as you don't give me any crap about how I prepare your grub, I guess you'll be okay. 3
Neutral 50 So, tell me: what do you think of cave fungus in watery mushroom sauce? 4
GREETING Anger 50 Okay, RJ had better have had a good reason to let you in. 5
Anger 35 Because right now, all I'm seeing is a mungo who's here to take our food and screw us over. 6
GREETING Neutral 50 Come on and get your grub! 7
GREETING Happy 25 Ready for some fine roast beast served in a creamy ginger sauce? 8
Anger 25 Yeah, I'll bet you are! Too bad it's still fungus chunks for us all! 9
GREETING Neutral 50 Feed's on! Get it while it's... food. {A little uncertain about whether or not it really counts as "food".} 10
GREETING Neutral 50 Hey, what's up? 11
LLAboutLamplight Where do you get food for this place? Happy 25 Honestly? When we can't scavenge some from outside, we mostly scrape it off the walls and skim it off the water. 12
Disgust 25 No, really. Most of our food comes from fungus that grows in these caves. It's not so bad when you get used to it, and we don't have much choice. 13
Disgust 10 At least it's filling, so we don't have to eat much of it. But, man oh man, it tastes terrible. 14
LLAboutLamplight2A Where does the fungus come from? Happy 25 It's pretty hard to find, and I hear it doesn't grow in other caves. I don't know why it's here, but without it, we'd be goners. 15
Disgust 25 "Think fungus just grows on trees? No, it grows in caves!" Ugh. Knock Knock came up with that one once, and now it's stuck in my head forever. {A little embarrassed by the joke.} 16
Disgust 10 Doesn't take any work to get it to grow down here. All I have to do is collect and prepare it. Mostly, I try to get the stink off it. 17
LLAboutLamplight2B How does the fungus grow? Fear 5 They say the fungus grows in the pools where the first Lamplighters dumped the mungos. That's about the most they ever helped us. 18
Happy 10 I don't know how true that is, but I know sometimes the scav team comes back with this strange meat that tastes terrible, but the fungus loves it. 19
Happy 25 I don't know where they find that meat, but if you could bring some back, I'd be glad to trade fungus for it. Of course, MacCready'd have to okay it. 20
LLAboutLamplight2C That's all I need to know for now. Neutral 50 Sure. 21
Friendly First Response
That sounds delicious. Anger 25 Okay, either you're a dirty liar or you're some sort of freak. 22
Happy 50 Either way, you should fit in just fine around here! Folks call me Eclair, and I'm in charge of keeping this place fed. {Sudden laugh at the beginning (Hah!)} 23
Neutral 50 You need a meal, you come ask me. There's not much to go around, and it all tastes bad, but it'll keep you alive, and that's good enough. 24
The Mayor let me in for rescuing those kidnapped kids. Anger 50 Oh, great. Maybe next, he'll take in a Deathclaw or something. And he'll make it the town mascot. 25
Anger 25 But anyway, yeah, thanks for bringing them back in one piece. Maybe now they'll learn to be more careful out there! 26
Neutral 50 If you need what passes for food down here, look me up. Name's Eclair, and if you so much as snicker, I'll carve you up for steaks. {More teasing and playful at the end than actually menacing} 27
The Mayor let me in. I'm not planning on causing trouble. Anger 50 Oh, great. Maybe next, he'll take in a Deathclaw or something. He can make it the town mascot. 28
Anger 25 Anyway, my name's Eclair, and yes, I take care of the food here. Don't expect any scraps from our table. {Said as if he's tired of people making clever comments about how he must take care of the food because of his name.} 29
Rude First Response
I'd rather eat a Brahmin turd sandwich. With no bread. Happy 75 You got that right! After our regular meals, I bet some of us would give that a shot! If we had a brahmin down here, that is. {Massive laughter at the beginning. This is his style of joke.} 30
Neutral 50 Listen, my name's Eclair - don't laugh - and I'm in charge of the food down here. We haven't got much, but I do what I can to spice it up. 31
Neutral 50 If you need a meal down here, just talk with me. You'll hardly even know you're eating cave mold. 32
Hey, I rescued those kids from the Slavers. You owe me some respect, kid. Anger 50 Oh, really? So you're saying you brought back three more hungry mouths, too? Great, you're just making my day better and better! {Very nasty and sarcastic} 33
Neutral 50 Look, I'm Eclair, and I'm in charge of the crap we call food down here. And we've got precious little enough to go around as it is. 34
Neutral 50 So, yeah, thanks for bringing those folks back alive, but don't expect me to throw you a big party over it. 35
Don't make me laugh. I don't give a damn about your food. Anger 50 That's a shame. I was going to serve yours with extra lung butter. {Especially nasty to player} 36
Anger 25 My name's Eclair, and I've dealt with bigger threats than you. So watch your step. 37
LLFood I'd like some food. Anger 10 Okay, but only one serving. We've got too many mouths to feed already. 38
I'd like some food. Anger 10 Just the one scoop per day, pal. Too many mouths around here already. 39
Happy 40 But at least that means you don't have to eat much of it, huh? 40
LLFungusTrade1 I've got some strange meat to trade for fungus. Happy 25 Oh great! The fungus pools'll gobble this right up! 41
I've got some strange meat to trade for fungus. Happy 25 Oh great! The fungus pools'll gobble this right up! 42
I've got strange meat to trade for fungus. Happy 25 Oh great! The fungus pools'll gobble this right up! 43
LLNicknames Why are you called Eclair? Neutral 50 Well, I didn't get the nickname for being fat and full of cream, if that's what you're asking. 44
Happy 25 Back when I was on the scav team, I found some pages from an old cook book. Sometimes I try them out. 45
Anger 25 Just for the record, don't try making an eclair out of cave fungus. The taste sticks with you, and not in a good way. 46
LLServices I'd like some food. Anger 75 Yeah, I heard about the sorts of things you'd do for this fungus. Well, you're cut off. Go scrounge your own food. 47
I'd like some food. Disgust 10 Bon appetit. {Said in mocking manner - the food isn't very appetizing} 48
I'd like some food. Anger 25 Sure thing, mungo. We don't have much to spare, so get ready to pay. {A little resentful, and happily bilking the player out of money.} 49
I'd like some food. Anger 25 Enjoy, if you've got the caps. {A little resentful, and happily bilking the player out of money.} 50


GOODBYE I'll let you get back to the food. Disgust 25 About time, man. This mold isn't getting any tastier. 51
I have to go now. Neutral 50 Keep an eye out. {Add a self-deprecating laugh to the end. The speaker is missing an eye.} 52
HELLO HELLO Happy 25 Hey, why don't you stick around and start a ruckus again? I think your corpse would be great fertilizer for the fungus. {Nasty} 53
HELLO Anger 10 Hey, Zip. Come over here. 54
HELLO Neutral 10 Here for your grub? 55
HELLO Neutral 10 Chow time? 56
HELLO Anger 10 Hey, you. 57
HELLO Neutral 50 What's your problem? 58
HELLO Neutral 50 You're funny looking. 59
LLEclairZipConv1 LL Happy 25 Hey, Zip. I got a question about your last scav trip. 60
LL Happy 25 Zip, can I ask you a question about last time you were out and about? 61
LLEclairZipConv3 LLEclairZipConv3 Happy 25 No, calm down, pop-head. Things are just fine. I just couldn't help but notice you didn't bring back any meat, like I asked. 62
LLEclairZipConv3 Happy 25 Calm down, Zip. It's just that you didn't bring any kindling down for cook-fires. Only thing worse than fungus is cold fungus, know what I mean? 63
LLEclairZipConv5 LLEclairZipConv5 Anger 5 Yeah, fine, just remember next time, okay? {Interrupting the other speaker at the beginning.} 64
LLEclairZipConv5 Anger 5 Sure, whatever. Just don't get distracted next time, Zip. {Interrupting the other speaker at the beginning.} 65
LLFoodConv2 LLFoodConv2 Anger 25 Now you're just making up words, aren't you? Here's your standard. 66
LLFoodConv2 Happy 25 So, cave fungus in sauce? Coming right up. 67
LLFoodConv2 Happy 50 Just like you're keeping them alive, Lucy. Here you go. 68
LLFoodConv2 Happy 25 Sure thing, dear. 69
LLFoodConv2 Disgust 25 Nice try, but you're still getting the same muck as everyone else. 70
LLFoodConv2 Neutral 50 Hell, I'd be happy with a clean set of spoons. Enjoy the meal. 71
LLFoodConv2 Disgust 50 Yeah, yeah, I know. Here's your "fun-guy." Should be as good as your jokes. {emphasizing "fun-guy" as "fungi".} 72
LLFoodConv2 Sad 25 Yeah, yeah, I get it, Zip. Here, knock yourself out. 73
LLFoodConv2 Sad 10 Calm down, Zip. It's not getting any blander. Here. 74
LLFoodConv2 Happy 25 Sure thing, Penny. 75
LLFoodConv2 Anger 25 Toughen up, Squirrel. The dirt adds flavor. 76
LLFoodConv2 Disgust 25 I can't believe you like this shit, RJ. 77
LLFoodConv2 Happy 25 Just like you're keeping them alive, Lucy. Here you go. 78
LLFoodConv2 Happy 25 Here. Now, get. 79
LLMayorDailyCheck1 LLMayorDailyCheck1 Anger 25 Yes, sir. Food's running low, but we're scraping by, RJ. We could use more supplies from the outside, especially if you want something with a flavor. 80
LLPrincessBullyResponse LLPrincessBullyResponse Anger 10 Because I know if you keep on bullying people, I can always pee on your cave fungus and you'll never know. 81
LLRandomConv1 LLConversation1 Happy 10 Hey. How you doing? 82
LLRandomConv2 LLConversation2 Anger 10 Doing good. I could do with better food, but couldn't we all? 83
LLRandomConvEnding LLRandomConvEnding Neutral 10 I hear that. Anyway, gotta be on my way. Later. 84
LLWhatsUp1 LLWhatsUp1 Happy 10 What're you up to, today? 85
LLWhatsUp2 LLWhatsUp2 Anger 10 Not much. Still trying to find a way to turn this fungus into something that doesn't taste like toenails. 86