|The following is based on Creation Club content and is not canon.|
On a table on the top floor of Hubris Comics.
Dave's been spending a ton of time over at Shenley's lately. We can all smell the alcohol on him but he's adamant he's doing research. He calls the place his personal castle and said the metal statues remind him of the golems in the script.
At first I was okay with it. I mean the battlemage he's playing does live in a castle, and it does have golems guarding the entrance. If that's what it takes to get a good performance out of him, so be it. Still, the other day I had Bob follow him and it turns out he spends half the time at the bar and the other half in the bathroom.
But knowing Dave he's going to tell me it's his goddamn throne.
Dave's getting obsessed with this role. He comes to the set in full armor and demands we address him by his character's name. I tried having his agent call him only to find out he's cut off the electricity in his home. And I'm not sure what that was he had for lunch, but Bob swears it was still moving.
Next casting call I'm going to tell Jenny no more method actors.
Can someone please hide the new sword and helmet before the next shoot? I've told Dave time and time again that we'll live with his bullshit so long as he doesn't endanger the crew.
The fact that he brought a real sword on set is pretty much the opposite of what I asked for. He nearly sliced off Bob's ear whipping that thing around and I'm afraid if he kills him the insurance isn't going to cover it. On top of that, all the screaming he does in that fake language is starting to grate on everyone.
I warned him, one more stunt like this, and I'm going to write his character off with the most excruciating death imaginable. Let's see him method act that.
When Dave found out about the script changes, he just about lost it. He kept saying this nonsense about his new levitation spell and went out to the roof to prove he could fly. They're trying to talk him off the ledge right now but I feel like most of us would be okay with it if he went ahead and jumped.
The problem is he's wearing valuable set property, so we can't let that get damaged. I told Bob to go after him and secure the props before telling Dave he's fired.
Somehow Dave made it to the other ledge. He jumped onto one of his so-called golems and climbed up. They said Bob went after him but didn't make it across.
Now we're missing two actors and a whole bunch of props. I don't know how I'm going to explain this to the suits. No one knows where Dave went, but I'd be willing to bet he's still holed up in his imaginary castle.